Author: Buck Banks
Binds that Tie

JD Vance’s social awkwardness extends into his married life,
Because he can’t stop referring to Usha as his “Indian wife.”
JD has also said he’s still wishin’
That Usha wasn’t Hindu, but Christian,
And that’s why JD’s looking down a very long road of marital strife.
‘No Gag Reflex’

He’s upended the traditional food pyramid, he wants you to know,
And he’s protected us from vaccinations, though not measles and polio.
He’s tackling the goal of food affordability,
He’s extolling roadkill, which is cheap — there’s plenty!
And now Robert F. Kennedy Jr. is going to have his own TV cooking show.
Another Broken Promise

The Trump administration just ended a Medicare Plan D drug subsidy,
They repeatedly said, “Hands off Medicare,” so this is true treachery.
Coming on the eve of the 2026 midterms,
It’s making Republican lawmakers squirm,
So they don’t believe in “affordability,” but how about “electability?”
El-Sayed Calls B.S. on Democratic Party
“Your generation has a great bullshit meter, because you’re fed bullshit online all day. And the Democratic Party brand right now is so bullshit.”
— Michigan U.S. Senate candidate Abdul El-Sayed (D), quoted by The Atlantic, speaking to college students.
Resting in Peace

Donald Trump’s relationship to his “friends” is impugnable,
The late Lindsey Graham of South Carolina is a prime example.
Trump delivered a pro-forma eulogy —
A product of his diseased psychology,
And then he fell asleep during Lindsey Graham’s state funeral.
Toxin Got Johnson

Speaker Mike Johnson is an odious, Bible-thumping little twit,
Between Trump’s ire and contentious colleagues, he’s in a snit.
With nothing happening in the House,
One might expect the speaker to grouse,
And for once we agree — like Mike said: “I’m sick of this shit.”
Ass in a Morass

Trump and the Iranians seem to be in different realities,
Though they share a callousness toward the war’s casualties.
Is Trump insane
Or just insanely vain?
And how can we extract ourselves from his “Quagmire of the Vanities?”
H/T to Taegan Goddard


