Like Rudi, maybe Ron should compete on “The Masked Singer.”
That might dispel the strong scent of fascism that lingers.
But one thing we know about DeSantis —
Just like a hungry praying mantis,
He likes to eat chocolate pudding with his fingers.
Ron DeSantis got his ivy league education,
And now he wants to lead our nation.
The “Ohioan” is yearning
To take control of learning
And replace cognition with wing-nut indoctrination.
So Ron DeSantis skipped the CPAC wingnut confab,
Because he’s been so busy with his freedom grabs.
We can only hope his experiments
Are anything but permanent —
Dr. DeSantis has turned Florida into his own fascism lab.
Living under a Ron DeSantis regime will be tough.
He’s getting rid of “wokeness” and mamby-pamby stuff.
And when it comes to revamping Disney,
Ron’s wasting no time getting busy —
First item: Bring back Splash Mountain and “Song of the South.”
Scott Adams has become another right-wing windbag bore.
His racist rants and bigoted cant are widely deplored.
He claims he’s been strangled
Because “Dilbert’s” been canceled,
But maybe it’s ’cause the comic just wasn’t funny anymore.
He’s known as a gaslighting, showboating ass,
Just brimming with aplomb, bravura and sass.
Yes, he’ll still be at large,
So guard the teen girls in your charge,
Because that asshat Matt Gaetz has gotten a pass.
Why he attacked AP Black Studies is no mystery,
Though the reason’s buried in blatant sophistry.
He uses the white supremacy playlist
Because Ron DeSantis is a racist —
Why else do it in the month we celebrate Black history?
Donald Trump keeps egging Ron DeSantis on,
Making up nicknames, slinging them hither and yon.
I guess Ron DeSanctimonious
Was just too inharmonious,
So he’s dialed it back to just “Meatball Ron.”
House Republicans are knuckle-dragging cretins
Masquerading as tough-talking ruffians.
Touting the Second Amendment,
Don’t they look resplendent
Wearing suits with AR-15 lapel pins.
For U.S.-China relations, it wasn’t opportune,
Though for GOP wingnuts it was a PR boon.
See, Xi had a plan ta
Check the forecast in Montana,
But then we went and shot down his “weather” balloon.
Like Rudi, maybe Ron should compete on “The Masked Singer.”
That might dispel the strong scent of fascism that lingers.
But one thing we know about DeSantis —
Just like a hungry praying mantis,
He likes to eat chocolate pudding with his fingers.
