Karoline Leavitt is leaving the Trump White House life,
She was such a good liar, but she’s done with the tension and strife.
She was a terror at the podium,
Spewing falsehoods, spite and odium,
But she’s going to raise her babies as a Turning Point USA tradwife.
The contractor Trump hired was under-qualified and overpaid,
Though Trump says it was done by vandals with sharp blades.
But the damage wasn’t done by an Olympian vandal,
Trump did it himself, which is why it’s a scandal:
The Reflecting Pool was ruined by Trump’s 10-SUV motorcade.
Ron DeSantis once was one of the GOP’s rising stars,
But he fell from grace so very fast and so very far.
Congress gave Florida a $197 million allocation
Earmarked for electric car charging stations,
But DeSaneless would rather fund landing pads for flying cars.
JD Vance’s social awkwardness extends into his married life,
Because he can’t stop referring to Usha as his “Indian wife.”
JD has also said he’s still wishin’
That Usha wasn’t Hindu, but Christian,
And that’s why JD’s looking down a very long road of marital strife.
With Burmese pythons the Florida Everglades are overrun,
We’re killing some, but what do you do with a dead one?
Well, a guy in Fort Myers takes the dead snakes
And using every part of them, products he makes,
So he’ll trade you a free “specialty” pizza for a dead python.
