Florida’s Ron DeSantis has always been a fan of sports,
But his current game is enriching his GOP cohorts.
He feels it’s his Christian duty
To double down on meanness and cruelty,
So he’s turning our state parks into golf courses and pickleball courts.
With his presidential campaign on all but life support,
RFK Jr. is lobbying for a cabinet post, according to reports.
He’s approached the Trump campaign,
And with Harris, sought the same,
But so far, no one has promised him Secretary of Dead Bear Transport.
It’s pretty widely agreed: Trump’s campaign is a hot mess,
No one asserts anymore he’s playing thee-dimensional chess.
It’s a funny kind of campaign,
Based on lies, invective and blame,
And featuring press conferences at his golf courses — without the press.
Just when you thought you’d had all your shots
At your local neighborhood doc-in-the-box,
The World Health Organization
Offered some alarming information:
There’s a raging global outbreak of the dreaded monkey pox.
As a teen, JD questioned, which doesn’t make him a fag.
While at Yale, he dressed like a girl (we assume) as a gag.
The eyeliner was smokey,
But the blonde wig was hokey,
And Trump’s VP looked like a childless cat lady in drag.
No doubt, it’s a quixotic campaign on which he’s embarked.
So, is Robert Kennedy Jr. serious or is it all just a lark?
Why hasn’t his anti-vaxxer conspiracy
And bug-eaten brain shit-canned his candidacy?
And do we really want to elect a guy who dumped a dead bear in Central Park?
It’s not just the usual Trumpian racist attack,
Or the “birther” soundbites from that tired old soundtrack.
On stage at the NABJ,
Trump came up with something creative to say:
Kamala Harris isn’t Black, she “turned Black.”
For Republicans, it’s become something of an art —
Dealing with media over Trump’s latest brain fart.
In a return to 2016,
He resurrected his anti-Black theme,
Leaving GOPers no alternatives but “deny, defer and depart.”
Don’t be fooled by changes reported at Project 2025,
That plan to turn government into a right-wing hive.
The press says it’s falling apart,
That Dems and Trump staked its evil heart,
But like a zombie, it may seem dead, but it’s very alive.
From Trump’s “stolen election” lies, we can’t get no relief,
He carps on about stolen votes, but he never names the thief.
Somebody needs to tell this guy
Americans aren’t buying his lies,
And that he’s turned us into the United States of Disbelief.
