Imagine if a liberal said something like this:
“These broads are millionaires, lionized on TV and in articles about them, reveling in their status as celebrities and stalked by griefparrazies. I have never seen people enjoying their husband’s death so much.”
Rightwingers like Ann Coulter get away with everything, no matter how heinous. Her book will probably be at the top of the best-seller list within two weeks.
Let’s get this straight, so to speak. Pres. Sanctity is Only for Straight People won’t allow my cousin and his partner of more than 20 years or my friends Joe and Julio, who have been together almost 10 years, to marry. But he wants these two clueless idiots to be able to have at it.
They’re too stupid to so much as spell the word matrimony if you put them together in a room with a dictionary open to the page that starts with marshmallow and ends with matzo. Read this and see if I’m wrong:
Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt denied Wednesday that wedding bells are in the air, saying they want to concentrate for now on their newborn daughter and Jolie’s two adopted children.
“There is nothing in the air. The focus is the kids, and we are obviously extremely committed to the children and as parents together,” Jolie [said]. “So that kind of says it for us, and to have a ceremony on top of it is nothing.”
If only. If only a ceremony between you two could be ignored. So…Brad’s adopted the kids you adopted and changed their last names to Jolie-Pitt, plus now you’ve had another child together. But you don’t want to like, be committed or anything.
Pitt and Jolie sold rights to images of Shiloh Nouvel through Getty Images photo agency, saying proceeds would be donated to a charity, not yet named.
People magazine paid a reported US$4 million for the right to release the pictures in North America, while Hello! obtained British rights.
Quick, somebody hand me a loaded firearm.
Brad and Angelina began their affair while he was still married to Jennifer Anniston. If he and the Beautiful One wed, it will be his second marriage. But he is 42, after all.
She, of course, is only 30 and was previously married to Billy Bob Thorton, whose name is presumably still tatooed on her person, although the vial of his blood she used to wear around her neck is no doubt bobbing in the waves somewhere. She was also married to the less famous Jonny Lee Miller. With Brad having only two names and the fact that their marriage will be her third, I can see why he’d be a little hesitant. If he had a brain.
So these two defective-in-every-way-except-looks people would have Pres. 30% Approval and Sinking’s blessings but none of my gay friends are fit? If I weren’t already divorced, I might get one just to protest.
Garrison Keillor is outraged that the best argument Republicans can make for people to vote for them this fall is to keep Nancy Pelosi from becoming Speaker of the House.
Because she’s from San Francisco.
…it does draw attention to the large, shambling galoot who is House speaker now, Tom DeLay’s enabler for years, a man who, judging by his public mutterances, is about as smart as most high school wrestling coaches. For the past year, Dennis Hastert has been two heartbeats from the presidency. He is a man who seems content just to have a car and driver and three square meals a day. He has succeeded in turning Congress into a branch of the executive branch. If Mr. Hastert becomes the poster boy for the Republican Party, this does not speak well for them as the Party of Ideas.
People who want to take a swing at San Francisco should think twice…the Bay Area is the cradle of the computer and software industry, which continues to create jobs for our children. The iPod was not developed by Baptists in Waco, Texas.
…Meanwhile, the Current Occupant goes on impersonating a president…And one of the basic assumptions of American culture is falling apart: the competence of Republicans.
You might not have always liked Republicans, but you could count on them to manage the bank…To see them produce a ninny and then follow him loyally into the swamp for five years is disconcerting, like seeing the Rolling Stones take up lite jazz. So here we are at an uneasy point in our history, mired in a costly war, a supine Congress granting absolute power to a president who seems to get smaller and dimmer, and the best the Republicans can offer is San Franciscophobia?
And flag burning amendments, and 700-mile border fences, and bans on gay weddings, singing the national anthem in Spanish and abortion in South Dakota.
Tough-love boat: You gotta give the Customs and Border Protection agency points for creativity. Or not.
Faced with a potential flood of illegal aliens apprehended in the impending immigration crack-down as the agency moves from its “catch-and-release” methodology (arrest them, give them a court date and hope they show — un-huh) to a “catch-and-don’t-release” one, CBP leaders asked managers to come up with ideas on how to deal with arrested illegals until they are tried or deported. Their creative answer? Charter cruise ships.
The bureau is considering either buying out-of-service cruise ships or leasing them to create “detention barges” at sea, the source said. The barges would act as jails, housing alleged violators of U.S. immigration law.
Because the cruise industry is not as profitable as it once was, CBP may get a bargain on ship space that has passed its prime, the source said. And, as the need for additional beds for detainees could only exist on a short-term basis, having a contract that creates more jail space for illegal immigrants will prove less costly than having to build new jails, the source said.
The bureau is considering either buying out-of-service cruise ships or leasing them to create ‘detention barges’ at sea.When the Federal Emergency Management Agency was pressed for housing space to accommodate Hurricane Katrina evacuees last year, it chartered three Carnival Cruise ships for months to provide shelter for up to 7,000 people.
That worked out really well for Carnival, which was paid $236 million for the six-month charters. They caught tons of flak and bad press for supposedly bilking the gubmint on the deal. (Disclosure: I do consulting work for Carnival.) In the end, a congressional panel decided the deal wasn’t so great for Carnival after all, and having the ships available as quarters for first-responders did aid in recovery efforts.
In May, President Bush predicted that 4,000 additional beds will be needed by the end of fiscal 2006, and thousands more will be needed in the coming years. That seems like an understatement, considering there are about 12 million illegal immigrants in the United States. In any event, nobody wants to build immigrant jails, apparently, and the ones we already have are, well, overcrowded.
Look, we’re going to need them, so we might just as well allot some vast areas of federal land to creating impregnable detention camps for hundreds of thousands of farm workers, day laborers, housekeepers, construction workers, cab drivers, cooks, waiters, custodians and hotel workers. Heck, that’d have to be easier than building a 400-mile-long fence, wouldn’t it?
The Senate failed to pass a constitutional amendment today that would have banned the marriage of the daughter of the vice president of the United States, Mary Cheney, to her lesbian partner, Heather Poe.
Senators voting against the anti-gay “Federal Marriage Amendment” were all members of the Cheneys’ own party, except for Robert Byrd of West Virginia, a former member of the Ku Klux Klan, and Sen. Ben Nelson of Nebraska, whose toupee may be on a bit too tight. Republican Sen. Lindsey Graham of South Carolina, who is 50 years old and unmarried, and about whom gay rumors have been swirling, voted for the bill.
Senators voting for the gay-bashing amendment:
|
Alexander (R-TN) Allard (R-CO) Allen (R-VA) Bennett (R-UT) Bond (R-MO) Brownback (R-KS) Bunning (R-KY) Burns (R-MT) Burr (R-NC) Byrd (D-WV) Chambliss (R-GA) Coburn (R-OK) Cochran (R-MS) Coleman (R-MN) Cornyn (R-TX) Craig (R-ID) Crapo (R-ID) |
DeMint (R-SC) DeWine (R-OH) Dole (R-NC) Domenici (R-NM) Ensign (R-NV) Enzi (R-WY) Frist (R-TN) Graham (R-SC) Grassley (R-IA) Hatch (R-UT) Hutchison (R-TX) Inhofe (R-OK) Isakson (R-GA) Kyl (R-AZ) Lott (R-MS) Lugar (R-IN) |
Martinez (R-FL) McConnell (R-KY) Murkowski (R-AK) Nelson (D-NE) Roberts (R-KS) Santorum (R-PA) Sessions (R-AL) Shelby (R-AL) Smith (R-OR) Stevens (R-AK) Talent (R-MO) Thomas (R-WY) Thune (R-SD) Vitter (R-LA) Voinovich (R-OH) Warner (R-VA) |
Status quo won the day here in California yesterday. State Treasurer Phil Angelides, who had the endorsement of labor unions as well as both of California’s U.S. senators, won the Democrative primary for governor, with nearly 48 percent of the vote (as of 5AM PST). Steve Westly, the state controller, received about 44 percent of the vote.
Gov. Schwarzenegger ran unopposed in the Republican primary and his handlers have done an effective job of keeping him quiet and out of the headlines over the past few months. As a result, the governor’s polling has “rebounded” to about 44 percent.
Schwarzenegger embarks on a bus tour of the state today. At the same time, the state’s labor unions — who soundly defeated four voter initiatives proposed by the governor last year, and who are credited with handing victory to Angelides yesterday — are said to be readying a new fusilage of ads against the governor to begin airing over the summer.
Insurance Commissioner John Garamendi appears to have won the Democratic primary for lieutenant governor against state Sen. Jackie Speier.
Former governor and Oakland Mayor Jerry Brown won the nomination for state attorney general, and is predicted to walk to victory in November. (Former congressman Ron Dellums appears to have won the nomination for Brown’s old job as mayor of Oakland.)
In the fight to win the CA 50 seat of jailed former congressman Duke Cunningham north of San Diego, Republican Brian Bilbray defeated Democrat Francine Busby 49 percent to 45 percent. The two could face each other again in November.
Yesterday was our biggest day yet in the 18 months Pensito Review has been in publication. We had over 34,000 page views in the 24 hour period, according to the Webalyzer service provided by our hosting company.
Thanks to all our regular readers — and you know who you are. And welcome to new readers, including the nearly 1 percent of that traffic that apparently came from the U.S. House of Representatives.
Pundits say that Trump’s $5,000 midterm bribe was an overreach,
And they agree that if lies were a crime, he’d be impeached.
Despite all the dividend promises he’s made,
The fact is, not one has ever been paid,
So even before the midterms, he already owes us $8,000* each.
*$5000 stimulus checks via “DOGE dividend”; $2000 stimulus checks via a “tariff dividend”; $1000-plus checks via “savings” from expiring Affordable Care Act subsidies
