Just a mile from the airport, the FAA’s concerned about its height,
Though the agency has determined that it presents no danger to flights.
The 259-foot Arc du Trump monstrosity —
A monument to his narcissism and pomposity —
Will be even uglier with a set of blinking red aviation obstruction lights.
That disgraced George Santos thinks he’s pretty cagey,
Betting the prediction markets when he’s feeling wagery.
Maybe he will, maybe he won’t,
Maybe he’ll do, maybe he’ll don’t,
So we’ll take an event contract he’ll end up in jail — on Kalshi.
When Peter Thiel and Don Jr. funded the Enhanced Games, they had one hope:
That Olympic-level athletes would perform better when competing on dope.
But world records went unbroken
And Pete and Donnie took a soakin’,
Now they’re stuck, sliding down that slippery, money-losing transhumanism slope.
Pentqgon Pete’s “Defensive” Department’s created a new Catch-22,
Hegseth’s war on the media is petty, but what’s a Fox host to do?
By designating the room “classified,”
He’s left reporters hamstrung and hog-tied,
Because the PRESS can’t access the Pentagon PRESS office, they’re screwed.
The Dems want to move on from 2024, but the Bidens won’t let them go.
Jill’s out with her memoir and making the rounds of the talk shows.
Joe’s suing the Department of Justice,
Hunter’s doing far-right podcasts,
Please just shut the F up Bidens, that means you: Hunter, Jill and Joe!
From Trump’s “stolen election” lies, we can’t get no relief,
He carps on about stolen votes, but he never names the thief.
Somebody needs to tell this guy
Americans aren’t buying his lies,
And that he’s turned us into the United States of Disbelief.
