Rubio the Cubano
We’ve not heard the last of young Marco Rubio,
Who has presidential aspirations out the culo.
At Senate hearings
He makes it clear he’s
The Republican Party’s el numero uno Cubano.
Tag: Marco Rubio
Romney Still Leads Republican Field for 2016
21%
Mitt Romney’s lead among the GOP presidential field, followed by Sen. Rand Paul and Mike Huckabee at 11%, Jeb Bush at 10%, Ben Carson at 9%, Gov. Scott Walker at 8% and Sen. Marco Rubio at 5%, according to a new Fox News poll.
The Curse of the SOTU Response
2007: Jim Webb (out of politics, although he’s making a quixotic presidential bid)
2008: Kathleen Sebelius (Obamacare rollout!)
2009: Bobby Jindal (uncomfortably awkward intro, his star has fallen)
2010: Bob McDonnell (felony conviction)
2011: Paul Ryan (losing VP nominee, though he’s still a top GOP voice)
2012: Mitch Daniels (out of politics)
2013: Marco Rubio (the great water incident, incident, maybe running for the White House)
2014: Cathy McMorris Rodgers (safe – so far)
The Great Negotiator
The new Cuba deal gives Marco Rubio fits.
He says Obama negotiates like a half-wit.
But truth be told,
Obama didn’t fold.
It was Pope Francis who made him do it.
Whither this Weatherman?
He always said he was a conservatist,
And he’s surely an American exceptionalist.
Who knew he had the potential,
Let alone the credentials —
But apparently Marco Rubio is a climate scientist!
A Third Alternative: Just Answer the Freakin’ Question, Marco
If you want a taste of what passes for honesty and frankness from Republican leaders these days, here’s a quote from Florida Sen. Marco Rubio after he was asked at an educational forum if he ever smoked pot.
“If I tell you that I haven’t, you won’t believe me. And if I tell you that I did, then kids will look up to me and say, ‘Well, I can smoke marijuana because look how he made it. He did alright so I guess I can do it too.'”
So you see, Marco isn’t going to respond because he can’t control what people will do with his answer. If your idea of presidential material is cutesy mind games or outright stonewalling (a term originated to describe Republican Pres. Richard Nixon’s way of blocking information to the press), then Marco is your guy.
Rubio Has Big Fundraising Quarter
$2.28 million
Amount Sen. Marco Rubio (R-FL) raised during the first quarter of 2013 across three affiliated political committees, Roll Call reports. “Adopting a fundraising strategy usually employed by national party committees and major presidential nominees, the Florida Republican set up a joint fundraising committee with his personal campaign account and his political action committee, Reclaim America.”
Can Marco Rubio Stand National Scrutiny?
The enduring notion that the ‘Republican savior’ may have feet of clay has followed him since his arrival on the national stage three years ago. It’s been a subject of gossip among the chattering Miami politicos at The Biltmore, a talking point pushed by bloodthirsty Democrats eager to stop his ascent, and a constant source of frustration in the Senator’s orbit. … Rubio is just 41, but he has already served as Speaker of the Florida House of Representatives. And his quick rise to national stardom, along with his long, varied career in state politics, well-known financial troubles, and ties to an embattled former congressman have combined to prompt many in the political class — including some of his most enthusiastic boosters — to speculate that the Senator’s pristine political brand will collapse under the weight of national scrutiny.
— McKay Coppins, writing on Buzzfeed.
Twitter Not Amused by Rubio’s Ill-Timed Tweet
PR’s own Buck nominated Florida Sen. Marco Rubio (GOP/Tea) for the “Really Trying Way Too Hard” Hall of Fame after Rubio told the gossip site TMZ that his favorite songs of all-time are NWA’s “Straight Outta Compton,” Eminem’s “Lose Yourself” and Tupac’s “Killuminati.”
The likely 2016 Republican presidential candidate, recently dubbed by Time Magazine the “saviour” of the party, is also brandishing a reputation as the life of the party, and nothing says frat boy quite like this tweet, posted the day the economy-wrecking sequester took effect.
If I put #HarlemShake video 2gether in Senate who should be in it?Taking suggestions now. http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?utm_campaign=Fee
Rubio apparently didn’t spend the day trying to figure out how to keep from damaging the economy or how to save American jobs, but instead daydreaming about his own fantasy football-esque dance party. Here were some of the responses to his call for suggestions on his Twitter feed.*
- @jbminn — @marcorubio I’d suggest you stop wasting time and money.
- @haroldpollack — @marcorubio even I am too cool for the Harlem shake.
- @devincf — I suggest you fix the sequester.
- @Brian_Thill — LOL you are so hip!! OMG!!1! wheres my checkbook
Look Out Liberals — Rubio Hydrates!
“Send the liberal detractors a message that not only does Marco Rubio inspire you…he hydrates you too.” — Nonsensical call to action from the Reclaim America PAC, Sen. Marco Rubio’s political action committee that raises money to elect conservatives to the Senate.
For a minimum donation of $25, Rubio’s supporters can buy a water bottle with his name on it and thereby scare thirsty liberals. As inexplicable as the message itself is the fact that the photo and caption have received over 71,000 “Likes” on Facebook (and counting).
