Soon as the deal was done, the GOPers started to bitch,
Though they closed no loopholes nor upped taxes on the rich.
Sure, right-wingers ain’t happy
About getting an ass-whupping from Pappy,
To which we say, “Shut up and eat your turd sandwich.”
Lil’ Marco Rubio has once again taken offense,
Saying the L.A. Dodger’s stunt is at Catholics’ expense.
Lil’ Marco’s defending nuns
Over some innocent LGBTQ fun,
And the Dodger’s promotion of the “Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence.”
Tucker Carlson was the darling of the ultra-right,
Misogynist, supremacist, his bona fides were airtight.
But then there was that text —
The one that got him axed —
On seeing “Trump guys” attack an “antifa kid”: “it’s not how white men fight.”
When Rupert fired his Fox News star Tucker,
No one felt sympathy or offered him succor.
His viciousness and nastiness
Were matched only by his hatefulness,
So suffice to say we won’t miss that fulminating fucker.
The United States strives to be a good host,
Welcoming your poor, your tired, etc., to our coasts.
But when it comes to the Chinese,
We should stop aiming to please,
Since learning we’ve been hosting secret police outposts.
As the cold rains fell, on and on,
And Fort Lauderdale sank on down,
Floridians were asking,
While slogging and bailing:
Where, oh where, is our Governor Ron?
Clarence Thomas stands accused of ethics violations.
“WTF Harlan Crow?” asks a disgusted nation.
The Senate’s mounting an investigation,
But we just have one burning question:
Why would anyone want to take Clarence Thomas along on vacation?
Donald Trump vows to his enemies he’ll fight ’em.
D.A. Alvin Bragg said of Trump, “I’ll indict him.”
Ron DeSantis’ unasked-for solution
Is to toss out the Constitution,
‘Cause he’s promised Trump not to extradite him.
Like Rudi, maybe Ron should compete on “The Masked Singer.”
That might dispel the strong scent of fascism that lingers.
But one thing we know about DeSantis —
Just like a hungry praying mantis,
He likes to eat chocolate pudding with his fingers.
Ron DeSantis got his ivy league education,
And now he wants to lead our nation.
The “Ohioan” is yearning
To take control of learning
And replace cognition with wing-nut indoctrination.
Kevin McCarthy is a sad spineless clown,
Who’s letting the wingnuts kick him around.
The House right-wingers
Are just performative whingers
Who’re pushing the country toward a government shutdown.
