To make a fast buck, Donald Trump has always been keen,
But our entrepreneurial president’s latest move is just obscene.
At the height of the pandemic,
His motives were purely economic
When he sought exclusive rights to a German COVID-19 vaccine.
Trump’s response to coronavirus has been just pathetic —
He’s sidelined the scientists and muzzled the medics.
He can’t maintain his focus,
The stats he cites are bogus,
And it seems like we’re in for a full-blown Trumpidemic.
Donald Trump’s approach to governing doesn’t inspire us,
And if we worked for him, he’d probably fire us.
But when it comes to our health
Versus protecting the wealth,
He’d sacrifice us to save the markets from coronavirus.
Trump wants to govern as if he were royalty,
Extracting from the rabble servility and fealty.
He’s making lists of the faithless,
The traitorous, the treasonous,
And all others must pledge oaths of loyalty.
The listeners were the problem, says Trump, in retrospect.
Without the listeners, he could speak his mind, unchecked.
Now that will stop,
No one will eavesdrop,
And all Trump’s calls with foreign leaders will be absolutely “perfect.”
OK, we all knew the Senate was going to acquit,
And that truth and justice had nothing to do with it.
Though Trump’s still aggrieved,
And we’re feeling peeved,
We admit we agreed when he said, “It was all bullshit.”
The Senate has acquitted him of misdemeanors and high crimes,
But Donald Trump still has us watching closely for dementia signs.
In his State of the Union
We detected some confusion —
During the whole 78 minutes of speaking, he only lied 31 times.
For Iowans it’s always been important to be first,
But last night Iowa’s caucus bubble was burst.
They’re good at milking cows
And growing corn and raising sows,
But at creating mobile phone applications, they’re the worst!
Trump’s impeachment trial has been full of moments teachable,
Though agreement on high crimes and misdemeanors seems unreachable.
But out of the rhetorical profusion
Comes one Republican conclusion:
That nothing Donald Trump has done, is doing or may do is impeachable.
Science says climate change causes California’s fire woes.
Science says climate change has got us all in its throes.
We believe the science,
But Trump remains defiant.
His idiotic response is, “I don’t think science knows.”
