Frist Sold Stock in Family-Owned Healthcare Conglomerate Days Before Stock Price Fell

Frist is lucky because he is part of the most corrupt leadership the U.S. Congress has ever had – and in partnership with his even more corrupt cronies who run the administration – it’s a dead cinch he’ll never be questioned about this extremely suspicious coincidence.

What a coincidence! When Dr. Bill Frist became a senator, like all multimillionaires who hold public office, he put his share of his family’s vast holdings in Hospital Corporation of America into a blind trust. The rules of the blind trust say that he’s not allowed to know how much is in the trust at any given point, however he can instruct the administrator to sell his assets whenever he chooses.

In June, something motivated the Senate Majority Leader to instruct the administrator of his trust to sell all the HCA stock owned by his wife, daughter and himself. You’ll never guess what happened next:

Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist, a potential presidential candidate in 2008, sold all his stock in his family’s hospital corporation about two weeks before it issued a disappointing earnings report and the price fell nearly 15 percent.

Frist held an undisclosed amount of stock in Hospital Corporation of America, based in Nashville, the nation’s largest for-profit hospital chain. On June 13, he instructed the trustee managing the assets to sell his HCA shares and those of his wife and children, said Amy Call, a spokeswoman for Frist…

HCA shares peaked at midyear, climbing to $58.22 a share on June 22. After slipping slightly for two weeks, the price fell to $49.90 on July 13 after the company announced its quarterly earnings would not meet analysts’ expectations. On Tuesday, the shares closed at $48.76.

The value of Frist’s stock at the time of the sale was not disclosed. Earlier this year, he reported holding blind trusts valued at $7 million to $35 million.

If Sen. Frist’s holdings were $7 million, the 15 percent he did not lose had a value of a little over $1 million. If the trust held $35 million, he saved himself a loss of over $5 million.

Let’s review: First, apropos of nothing, Sen. Frist had a flash of inspiration – maybe a message from God? – that prompted him to sell his stock, just days before the stock lost value.

Second, he is part of the most corrupt leadership the U.S. Congress has ever had – and in partnership with his even more corrupt cronies who run the administration – it’s a dead cinch he’ll never be questioned about this extremely suspicious coincidence.

Can you believe his luck?

Christians: Penguins Evidence of Intelligent Design

The angels wore tuxedos: According to ChristianToday.com, the documentary “March of the Penguins” proves the doctrine of intelligent design. The film by Luc Jacquet documents the nine-month-long mating cycle of emperor penguins in Antarctica: The birds exit the water at the coast, waddle 70 miles inland to nesting grounds, mate, lay an egg and then take turns waddling the 140-mile round-trip to eat fish.

“The complexity of the penguins’ lifestyle testifies to a Divine Creator,” said one commentator on Christian Answers. “To think that natural selection or even the penguins themselves could come up with the idea to migrate miles and miles multiple times each year without their partner or their offspring is a bit insulting to my intellect. How great is our God!”

I think the best argument against intelligent design is the continued existence of people who believe in it. Instead, the existence of critters like the Christian commentator cited above is better explained by natural selection, since they tend to marry people who share their Christian views and then mate and produce little Christians, thereby perpetuating their kind (and ideology).

The problem with the whole intelligent design debate is that it is not exclusive of evolution, which is pretty intelligent — I give you the duck-billed platypus with its cool hybrid styling and most radical poison barb. How great is our Darwin!

Study: Reading Pensito Review Easier, Less Time-Consuming Than Reading Work-Related E-Mails

E-mail hell: A recent survey by Information Mapping Inc. revealed that 80% of more than 6,000 people surveyed consider e-mail writing skills to be “extremely” or “very” important to doing their job effectively. A corresponding survey of Pensito Review editors found that 100% of respondents consider liberal-minded screed-writing skills to be “essential” or “really” important to adding the “opinion,” if not the “news” part, to a “news and opinion” Web site.

The IM results also showed that approximately 65% of respondents spend from one to three hours per day reading and writing e-mails, with 40% “wasting” 30 minutes to three hours reading “ineffectively” written e-mails. The Pensito survey also found that 100% of respondents spent approximately five minutes reading comments that didn’t agree with their posted opinion, versus spending up to four hours reading the well-written and intelligent comments that agreed with them.

Among the primary challenges and issues concerning e-mails that the IM survey exposed were:

  • Recipient is not clear as to what should be done or how to act on the information
  • Content is disorganized
  • Critical information is missing or hard to find
  • Content is too long, wordy and difficult to read

Again, 100% of respondents to the Pensito Review survey agreed that too many people spend too much time reading stupid, time-wasting, unclear work-related e-mails when they could be reading the PR.

Unlike crappy e-mails, the Pensito Review is clear about what readers should do (i.e., create a left-wing organization to peacefully overthrow the Bush regime) or how they should act (i.e., like you’ve got a brain in your head and a spine in your back). Pensito Review’s content is very well organized, if occasionally not too well thought-out.

On Pensito Review, critical information is easy to find and is never missing � don’t worry, we tell you everything you need to know. PR’s content is not too long, wordy or difficult to read (except for that John Kerry speech I posted yesterday, for which I apologize).

So forget those pesky e-mails cluttering up your in-box. Read Pensito Review today � 100% of its editors can’t be all wrong.