Lame Name Games
The Right: “Obama is a socialist!”
The Left: “Obama is a corporatist!”
But in this endless game of “Yo Mama,”
Match point goes to Obama:
“Me? I’m just a political pragmatist.”
Category: Poetic Justice
Better Left Digitally Dead
Please save me from the Cult of Celebrity!
That clacking gaggle of pathos, bathos and calamity.
Why’d they bail out the Kardashians
And allow them to Twitter again?
Who cares? They’ll still be “digitally dead” to me.
The Stinking Deal
The Republicans have just out-psyched
The president on the Bush-era tax hikes.
And they’ll take away healthcare
And they’ll stop START right there —
So is this what “compromise” smells like?
Jellin’ Like Orwellian
The gubmint’s trying to stem the Wikileaks release,
Telling employees it’s like a communicable disease.
If the stuff ain’t been declassified,
Workers’ access must be denied —
Or so says the U.S. Department of Thought Police …
Baby Don’t Drill
As an environmentalist he’s gotten high billing,
And as a man of principle, he seems willing.
And whatever the motivation
Behind Obama’s vacillation,
We’re glad he finally came out against offshore drilling.
Sneaky Weaky Leaks
Oh, the revelations of the Wikileaks!
Putin’s a bully! Berlusconi’s a freak!
But apparently banal insults
Is just the language of consuls,
Get over it already — turn the other cheek!
Give ‘Em Some Lip
Now Obama’s a competitive fellow,
On the court he bullies and bellows.
Besides the ‘Bipartisan Shove,’
He’s developed a new move —
They’re calling it ‘Kissing the Elbow.’
I See I Saw
Electric scanners are TSA’s great hope
For detecting guns, bombs and dope.
While screeners insist
They’ve no prurient interests,
Why do they call it a nude-o-scope?
Obama Saves Turkey
Being president ain’t always fun,
Like flying on Air Force One.
But then comes Thanksgiving,
And to earn his living,
The Prez has to pardon a tom.
The TSA Tickle
Nine years ago, who woulda thunk
That airport security would be such bunk.
Well, let me give you the low-down,
When it comes to the pat-down —
Hey man, don’t touch my junk!
