Author: Buck Banks
Homan’s a Bad Omen
Trump told little Greg Bovino to get the heck out of town,
And he’s sending Tom Homan to manage the Minneapolis crackdown.
But if you think ICE thugs have gone too far,
And you’re expecting conciliation from the Border Czar,
Trump’s just ensuring more dangerous behavior by “defining deviancy down.”
Murphy: Democrats Must Be United in ICE Funding Fight
“I will say in the past, Republicans have just waited us out because they thought that we would break. And we have broken in the past. And this would be, I think, a very dangerous moment for us to do that because of the very specific moral question being put to the nation: Does the president of the United States get to murder American citizens? The answer to that question has to be no, but it likely will only be no if we’re in a position to win this fight.”
— Sen. Chris Murphy (D-CT), quoted by the New Republic, on blocking funding for ICE.
Omar Says Investigation Is Sign of Trump’s Panic
“Sorry, Trump, your support is collapsing and you’re panicking. Right on cue, you’re deflecting from your failures with lies and conspiracy theories about me. Years of ‘investigations’ have found nothing. Get your goons out of Minnesota.”
— Rep. Ilhan Omar (D-MN), responding to President Trump saying Monday the Justice Department is investigating her, Politico reports.
Klobuchar: Two-Thirds of Murders in Minneapolis Were by Federal Agents
“There have been three killings in Minneapolis since the beginning of the year. Two have been committed by federal agents, one ICE, and the other border control. That’s what we’re dealing with here.”
— Sen. Amy Klobuchar (D-MN), quoted by the Wall Street Journal.
Walz Asks, What’s the Plan?
“What’s the plan, Donald Trump? What is the plan? What do we need to do to get these federal agents out of our state? If fear, violence and chaos is what you wanted from us, then you clearly underestimated the people of this state and nation.”
— Minnesota Gov. Tim Walz (D), quoted by CBS News.
Trump Lost at Davos
“Donald Trump and his team clearly went to Davos determined to demean and insult their hosts. It was, one might say, a novel approach to diomacy: ‘You’re pathetic, your societies and economies are falling apart, now give us Greenland.’ … And it worked about as well as you’d expect. Trump may have imagined that the Europeans would cower in the face of his wrath. Instead, they humiliated him. He dropped his latest tariff threats in return for a ‘framework’ that gave the United States essentially nothing it didn’t already have — and left behind a Europe that is finally united in resistance to his bullying.”
— Paul Krugman
Framework But No Paperwork
Donald Trump bumbled about WEF at Davos like a clown,
But he made a Greenland deal before leaving town.
He came away with a framework,
But alas, with no paperwork,
Because oddly, through a clerical error (?), nobody wrote anything down.
Hot Pot of Despots
We tend to think of Donald Trump as an evil, narcissistic race-baiter,
But he actually has designs on being something much greater.
Like an urban dumpster attracts rats
Trump’s Board of Peace attracts autocrats,
Because, as Donny is wont to opine, “Sometimes you need a dictator.”
The Biden-Maduro Conspiracy
It’s as if Donald Trump’s brain has an infection
That keeps him obsessed with losing the 2020 election.
He now says that Biden and Maduro schemed,
Using Venezuelan software, to rig voting machines,
In what was surely the world’s greatest evil-genius collaboration.
