Day: February 9, 2006

Propaganda: A letter from CIA leak prosecutor Patrick Fitzgerald reveals that Scooter Libby has admitted handing over secret military information to reporters, including Judith Miller — and even told the grand jury that he did it at the behest of his boss, Vice President Cheney.

Lucky for Herr Cheney and his former Flying Monkey, leaking classified data is no longer considered to be a serious crime:

Vice President Dick Cheney’s former chief of staff, I. Lewis (Scooter) Libby, testified to a federal grand jury that he had been “authorized” by Cheney and other White House “superiors” in the summer of 2003 to disclose classified information to journalists to defend the Bush administration’s use of prewar intelligence in making the case to go to war with Iraq, according to attorneys familiar with the matter, and to court records.

According to sources with firsthand knowledge, Cheney authorized Libby to release additional classified information, including details of the NIE [National Intelligence Estimate], to defend the administration’s use of prewar intelligence in making the case for war.

Libby specifically claimed that in one instance he had been authorized to divulge portions of a then-still highly classified [NIE] regarding Saddam Hussein’s purported efforts to develop nuclear weapons, according to correspondence recently filed in federal court by special prosecutor Patrick J. Fitzgerald.

Beyond what was stated in the court paper, say people with firsthand knowledge of the matter, Libby also indicated what he will offer as a broad defense during his upcoming criminal trial: that Vice President Cheney and other senior Bush administration officials had earlier encouraged and authorized him to share classified information with journalists to build public support for going to war. Later, after the war began in 2003, Cheney authorized Libby to release additional classified information, including details of the NIE, to defend the administration’s use of prewar intelligence in making the case for war.

Stupid terrorist: Today President Bush revealed that his anti-terrorist efforts had thwarted a plot to fly an airliner into a building in Los Angeles:

We now know that in October 2001, Khalid Shaykh Muhammad — the mastermind of the September the 11th attacks — had already set in motion a plan to have terrorist operatives hijack an airplane using shoe bombs to breach the cockpit door, and fly the plane into the tallest building on the West Coast. We believe the intended target was Liberty Tower in Los Angeles, California.

This makes absolutely no sense. How does a shoe bomber highjack a plane?

Wouldn’t a bomb used to “breach the cockpit door” do serious damage to the forward compartments, potentially de-stabilizing the plane?

And even if the bomb didn’t destroy the fuselage, after it explodes, the highjacker is weaponless and therefore no longer a threat.

So maybe there was another scenario — maybe the highjacker intended to use his shoe bomb as leverage to get the crew to comply with his demands:

Or let’s assume he gets into the cockpit:

The crew would have no reason to comply with the shoe bomber’s demands. What do they have to lose? They and the passengers are going to die in either case.

There is something missing in this story. Or the president lied.

Speaking of lying, the creepiest thing about President Bush is that we can never know for sure if he is prevaricating or merely an incompetent bungler.

In all of Los Angeles’ 500 squares miles, there is no “Liberty Tower,” which Mr. Bush identified as the target of the attack. Later in the day, the White House horse hockey brigade issued a correction: He meant the “Library Tower,” which is the former name of the city’s tallest building, now known as the US Bank Building.

Okay. Sounds straightforward. He bungled the name as he is wont to do. But isn’t his choice of words — “liberty” versus “library” — just too cute by half?

But was it a typical Bush malapropism — he just mangled “li-berry” for “liberty?” Or was it a subtle lie that enabled the president to utter a political keyword? As I’ve said before, I almost wish I believed he lied all the time, which would indicate cleverness, but I suspect he’s just the most incompetent person who has ever sat in the Big Chair.

Lastly, this is not the first plot we have heard of that targeted this building, so don’t expect anyone in Los Angeles to get too excited about the announcement today.

New Tomb Found in Valley of Kings
CAIRO, Egypt – American archaeologists have uncovered a pharaonic-era tomb in Egypt’s Valley of the Kings, the first uncovered there since King Tutankhamun’s in 1922, Egypt’s antiquities chief announced Wednesday. Zahi Hawass, head of the Supreme Council of Antiquities said, “Curse? what cur-aaaaiiiieeeee!!!”

Yer Out! No Baseball, Softball for 2012
TURIN, Italy – They’re out! Baseball and softball won’t be played at the 2012 London Olympics. Baseball and women’s softball remain on the program for the 2008 Beijing Games, and will be eligible to reapply for readmission to the 2016 games. The American sports have been replaced by cricket and pub darts for the London Games.

Chavez Calls Blair ‘Pawn of Imperialism’
CARACAS, Venezuela – Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez on Wednesday called British Prime Minister Tony Blair “a pawn of imperialism,” accusing him of siding with President Bush in a confrontation with Venezuela. Blair, known for his rapier-like wit when trading barbs with Parliament, replied, “I know I am, but what are you?”

Hezbollah Leader to Bush: ‘Shut Up’
BEIRUT, Lebanon – The leader of Hezbollah, heading a march by hundreds of thousands of Shiite Muslims Thursday, said President Bush and his secretary of state should “shut up” after they accused Syria and Iran of fueling protests over cartoons of the Prophet Muhammad. In the latest AP/IPSOS poll, six out of 10 Americans agree with Hezbollah that Bush and Rice both should just shut the hell up.

But it doesn’t rhyme: This is a poem made up entirely of actual things uttered by George W. Bush. They allegedly have been arranged for “aesthetic” purposes by Washington Post writer Richard Thompson. Though it is not actually haiku, it does read like a kind of blank verse.

BUSH HAIKU

I think we all agree, the past is over.
This is still a dangerous world.
It’s a world of madmen and uncertainty
And potential mental losses.

Rarely is the question asked
Is our children learning?
Will the highways of the Internet
Become more few?

How many hands have I shaked?
They misunderestimate me.
I am a pitbull on the pant leg of opportunity.

I know that the human being
And the fish can coexist.
Families is where our nation finds hope,
Where our wings take dream.

Put food on your family!
Knock down the tollbooth!
Vulcanize society!
Make the pie higher!

Make the pie higher!

Thanks to Lili.