God smacked: A Texas preacher has been telling his followers that God sent Hurricane Katrina to purge the sinners in New Orleans:
The Rev. Dwight McKissic, pastor of Cornerstone Baptist Church in Arlington, has asked if God sent the hurricane “to purify our nation.” He said, “I’m raising the question. At some point, God will hold us accountable for our sins … [New Orleanians] have devil worship. They advertise ‘Sin City’ tours. They celebrate Southern decadence. Girls go wild in New Orleans. Sometimes God does not speak through natural phenomena. This may have nothing to do with God being offended by homosexuality. But possibly it does.”
Possibly – but maybe God was sending another message. Statistically, the majority of folks who felt God’s wrath through Katrina include these groups:
- Republicans -There is no higher concentration of GOP voters anywhere in the country than Alabama, Mississippi and Louisiana. It is obvious that God singled out the GOP for punishment.
- Bush voters – Bush overwhelmingly carried the Gulf Coast region. It is plain to see now that those votes angered the Lord.
- Southerners – Every resident whom God smote with Katrina was a Southerner
- Evangelical Christians -The Deep South is a hotbed of evangelical believers. See how God unleashed his damnation upon them!
- White people – Most residents of the Gulf Coast are white. God sent them a message: Repent or die!
It has angered God that these people have committed sins that are too numerous to list, but suffice to say they include nine of the Big Ten: murder, extramarital sex, lying, stealing, coveting their neighbors’ asses, dissing thy parents, taking the Lord’s name in vain, working on Sunday, and – our favorite – worshipping graven images, because, ironically, some of them worship statues of the Ten Commandments. (The one Commandment that most people in the Deep South adhere to is belief in God.)
If God really did mean to smite gay people, he missed by about 2,000 miles. Statistically, ver few gays and lesbians – and even fewer “wild” girls, degenerate Southerners and devil worshippers – suffered in the disaster.