October 2025 - Page 5 of 6

Contagious, Always Fatal

October 9, 2025October 16, 2025 Buck Banks

In Moscow it’s generally known
Vlad Putin’s an evil little gnome.
Oligarchs in the know
Keep away from windows
To avoid catching Russian Sudden Death Syndrome.

Comey: ‘Not Guilty’

October 8, 2025October 14, 2025 Buck Banks

He pleaded not guilty to two Trumped-up charges, did James Comey,
Who, though he harpooned Hillary Clinton’s campaign, is no Trump homey.
So it falls to poor Lindsey Halligan
To return to the empty legal well again,
Because these charges against James Comey are just baloney.

Loomer Warns Trump Not to Pardon Maxwell

October 8, 2025 Buck Banks

“Do not do it. I repeat. Do not do it. There will be no coming back from that. I repeat again. For the love of God. Do Not Do It.”

— Laura Loomer, on X, warning President Trump not to pardon Ghislaine Maxwell.

Betting on the Shutdown Ending

October 7, 2025 Buck Banks

75%

Polymarket gives the government shutdown a 75% chance of ending sometime after October 15.

Inane Name Game

October 7, 2025 Buck Banks

In the Free State of Florida, we’ve got a lock on hokey,
So if Donald Trump wants something done, we say okey-dokey.
“Alligator Alcatraz” was really neat-o
And then we built the “Deportation Depot,”
But we saved the best playful name for last with “Panhandle Pokey.”

American Jews Turning Against Israel Over Gaza War

October 6, 2025 Buck Banks

61%

“Many American Jews sharply disapprove of Israel’s conduct of the war in Gaza, with 61 percent saying Israel has committed war crimes and about 4 in 10 saying the country is guilty of genocide against the Palestinians,” according to a Washington Post poll. “The findings are striking given the long-standing ties between the U.S. Jewish community and Israel, suggesting the potential for a historic breach over the Gaza war.”

GOP House Districts Consume More Obamacare Subsidies

October 6, 2025 Buck Banks

12 million

Bloomberg reports. “Twelve million Americans in Republican-held U.S. House districts are covered by health plans purchased through Affordable Care Act exchanges versus nine million living in Democratic-held districts. Of the 75 districts where at least 10% of the people are enrolled in Obamacare policies, 47 are represented by Republicans in the House.”

Oh No! My OOO!

October 6, 2025 Buck Banks

If you’re furloughed in a government shutdown, it’s wise
To craft an out-of-office reply that doesn’t proselytize.
But if you work for the Department of Education,
You can expect some unwelcome emendations,
As they fill your OOO with partisan distortions and lies.

If Mamdani’s a Socialist, Trump Is a Socialist

October 3, 2025 Buck Banks

“If you’re going to criticize the socialist Mamdani for wanting to own grocery stores, you better criticize Republicans who want a share of Intel, of Nvidia, or U.S. Steel. Owning even part of the means of production is a step toward socialism. It’s a bad idea and a dangerous precedent.”

— Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY), on X.

Over Half of Americans Think Economy Is Bad

October 3, 2025 Buck Banks

Month: October 2025

Contagious, Always Fatal

Comey: ‘Not Guilty’

Loomer Warns Trump Not to Pardon Maxwell

“Do not do it. I repeat. Do not do it. There will be no coming back from that. I repeat again. For the love of God. Do Not Do It.”

— Laura Loomer, on X, warning President Trump not to pardon Ghislaine Maxwell.

Betting on the Shutdown Ending

75%

Polymarket gives the government shutdown a 75% chance of ending sometime after October 15.

Inane Name Game

American Jews Turning Against Israel Over Gaza War

61%

GOP House Districts Consume More Obamacare Subsidies

12 million

Oh No! My OOO!

If Mamdani’s a Socialist, Trump Is a Socialist

“If you’re going to criticize the socialist Mamdani for wanting to own grocery stores, you better criticize Republicans who want a share of Intel, of Nvidia, or U.S. Steel. Owning even part of the means of production is a step toward socialism. It’s a bad idea and a dangerous precedent.”

— Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY), on X.

Over Half of Americans Think Economy Is Bad

59%

A new CBS News poll finds 59% of Americans say the economy is “getting worse” and 52% describe the job market as “bad.”

Poetic Justice

Verbatim

“If you are committing fraud against the American people, all of us in public leadership should be trying to stop it and throw you in prison for enriching yourself off the American taxpayer.”

— Vice President JD Vance, on Fox News.

“Your generation has a great bullshit meter, because you’re fed bullshit online all day. And the Democratic Party brand right now is so bullshit.”

— Michigan U.S. Senate candidate Abdul El-Sayed (D), quoted by The Atlantic, speaking to college students.

“We are done, Americans are done with endless conflict in the Middle East, spending trillions of dollars, American lives… this is insane and we have to call it for what it is.”

— Rep. Jason Crow (D-CO), on CNN.

Numerati

+175,000

“The U.S. State Department announced on Monday that it has revoked more than 175,000 visas during President Donald Trump’s administration so far,” Fox News reports.

$4,600

11

30%

A new American Research Group poll finds just 30% of Americans say they approve of the way Donald Trump is handling his job as president and 67% say they disapprove.

61% to 35%