Year: 2019
The Limits of Trumplomacy
A Third World dictator meeting with the purported envoy of democracy,
Turned into a futile exercise in global-stage pomp and idiocy.
During amateur hour,
The meeting went sour,
As they explored the outer limits of reality-TV Trumplomacy.
Gosar Explains Away Climate Change Via Photosynthesis
“Unfortunately you haven’t been taught about photosynthesis. Photosynthesis is where plants take carbon dioxide to produce oxygen. That’s a problem in today’s world. We haven’t taught kids exactly what’s going on in America and in science.”
— Rep. Paul Gosar (R-AZ), offering an interesting explanation for why he thinks climate change isn’t real, Axios reports.
A Warning from Cohen for Republicans
“I did the same thing you’re doing now for 10 years… protecting Mr. Trump. The more people that follow Mr. Trump blindly are going to suffer the same consequences I’m suffering.”
— Michael Cohen, testifying at the House Oversight Committee hearing yesterday.
Christie: Why Are No Republicans Defending Trump?
“The interesting thing is that there hasn’t been one Republican yet who has tried to defend the president on the substance, and I think that’s something that should be concerning to the White House. Why are no Republicans standing up and defending the president on the substance?”
— Former Gov. Chris Christie (R), in an interview on ABC News about the Michael Cohen hearings.
Phone Polling Response Rate Hits New Low
6%
“The Pew Research Center reported Wednesday that the response rate for its phone polls last year fell to just 6 percent — meaning pollsters could only complete interviews with 6 percent of the households in their samples. It continues the long-term decline in response rates, which had leveled off earlier this decade.”
Ivanka, Job Maker
Donald Trump thinks we’re all justa buncha yobs,
Who believe the outrageous lies he lobs.
In a speech just yesterday,
He had the temerity to say,
His daughter Ivanka had created “millions of jobs.”


