Verbatim

If a guy says you have no cojones, how do you punch him back, call him an asshole?

An angry Andrew Cuomo, quoted in the New York Daily News, about reports that Cuomo “summoned his war council to figure out how to fight back against his GOP rival” Carl Paladino (R) in the race for New York Governor. “The counterattack planning session came after Paladino issued a taunting letter that questioned Cuomo’s manhood, ripped his pop’s performance as governor and taunted him to ‘for the first time in your life be a man.'”

Something Strange is Happening in Riverdale

Archie_Obama_Palin1Strange things are happening on the primary-color streets of Riverdale, Archie’s hometown. Barack Obama and Sarah Palin share a malted — spiked with lord knows what!

Here’s the logline for the cover:

President Barack Obama and famed politician Sarah Palin get involved as Student Government campaigns spiral out of control at Riverdale High! The race between Archie and Reggie gets hot as campaign chaos reaches to the top, forcing an impromptu visit from these big-name politicos, who get pulled into the fray!

Probably a bunch of sophomore tea bagger troublemakers. And as if that wasn’t strange enough, the storyline spills over into a second issue with this cover and logline:

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The GOP-Fox 2010 Race Baiting Campaign Rolls on: Beck Puts Up Graphic, ‘Coons in Africa’

screenshot-beck-coons-in-africa

Over at News Hounds, where they watch Fox so we don’t have to, dear readers — for which I am, and you should be, eternally grateful — they caught one of the subtlest attempts at race baiting on the Republicans’ in-house network this year. During a bizarre peroration by Glenn Beck in which he tried his damnedest to help the campaign of Delaware Christian tea bagger Christine O’Donnell get up out of its defensive crouch, he flashed a header on the screen behind that said “Coons in Africa.”

The headline officially referred to O’Donnell’s opponent, Chris Coons, the Democratic nominee who is a county official in Delaware. But come on.

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