Tough Talk: Adventures in MilSpeak

Coalition communications: This is probably something that will engender the disdain of Editor Trish, but I find myself drawn to the Department of Defense press releases like an IED to the roadside. It’s weird because these releases are terrible. They are poorly written, full of doublespeak and just plain old B.S., and often don’t make a lick of sense.

But nonetheless, I find myself every few months back on the DoD site, signing up like a G.I. junky for e-mailed press releases. I’ll keep getting them for a couple of weeks and then unsubscribe when I can’t stand it anymore. So, occasionally, until I make myself ill, I’ll share some of the choicer gems from these military missives in this space.

In a release about an al Qaeda operative who was captured and a suspicious individual was killed who was later determined to be a “non-combatant,” we find this quote:

“Coalition forces take every precaution to mitigate risks to civilians while in pursuit of terrorists, and deeply regret any injury or death to non-combatants,” a Multinational Force Iraq statement issued after the incident said.

In the same release, for some reason, there was a bit about 450 detainees being released back into the population to this cheery speech:

‘We’re talking chemical agents here that could be packaged in a different format and have a great effect.’

Iraq’s national security adviser, Muwafaq al-Rubai, addressed the detainees at the Abu Ghraib theater internment facility and asked them to return to their jobs and share in the wealth of their country.

He said Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki has declared a reconciliation program for all those who are not tied to terrorism, and that there is no room for terrorists in Iraq.

I suppose the “Abu Ghraib theater internment facility” must be where the prisoners stage skits and plays as part of their rehabilitation.

Meanwhile, back in Washington, important work was getting done on Wednesday:

Labor and Defense Department officials celebrated the federal government’s support of National Guardsmen and reservists and the government’s role as a “model employer” at a ceremony here today.

“The message to America, to employers, to Guardsmen and reservists is your government is a model employer — your agencies, your secretaries,” Thomas F. Hall, assistant secretary of defense for reserve affairs, said.

Today’s ceremony concluded an initiative to have all 16 cabinet secretaries sign an Employer Support of the Guard and Reserve statement of support. The heads of all 80 federal agencies also have signed the statement, Hall said.

The statement signed is a 5-Star Statement of Support for the Guard and Reserve, meaning that the highest support criteria established by the Committee for Employer Support of the Guard and Reserve have been met. Those criteria include an employer’s willingness to sign a public statement of support, compliance with the Uniformed Services Employment and Re-Employment Rights Act and adopting policies that go “above and beyond” what’s required by law in supporting Guardsmen and reservists.

“This is the first document in U.S. history that has been signed by all the members of a president’s Cabinet in support of the National Guard and Reserves,” said Labor Secretary Elaine Chao, the first non-defense cabinet member to sign statement, said. “This is an historic and sweeping pledge to support our Guard and Reserve.”

Wow, a 5-Star statement! That should shame all those folks with “Support Our Troops” ribbons on their Hummers.

And then there are the items that you wonder didn’t make it into the MSM. Like the 500 weapons of mass destruction found in Iraq. Seems like that should have garnered more attention:
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WHO: Patterns Emerging in Avian Flu Epidemic

This week’s issue of the World Health Organization (WHO) Weekly Epidemiological Record, sets out results from the first analysis of epidemiological data on all 205 laboratory-confirmed H5N1 avian influenza cases officially reported to WHO by onset date from December 2003 to 30 April 2006.

Data used in the analysis were collected for surveillance purposes. Quality, reliability and format were not consistent across data from different countries. Despite this limitation, several conclusions could be reached:

1. The number of new countries reporting human cases increased from four to nine after October 2005, following the geographical extension of outbreaks among avian populations;
2. Half of the cases occurred in people under the age of 20 years; 90 percent of cases occurred in people under the age of 40;
3. The overall case fatality rate was 56 percent. Case fatality was high in all age groups but, was highest in persons aged 10 to 39;
4. The case fatality profile by age group differs from that seen in seasonal influenza, where mortality is highest in the elderly;

Case fatality was high in all age groups, but was highest in persons aged 10 to 39

5. The overall case fatality rate was highest in 2004 (73 percent), followed by 63 percent to date in 2006, and 43 percent in 2005;
6. Assessment of mortality rates and the time intervals between symptom onset and hospitalization and between symptom onset and death suggests that the illness pattern has not changed substantially during the three years;
7. Cases have occurred all year round. However, the incidence of human cases peaked, in each of the three years in which cases have occurred, during the period roughly corresponding to winter and spring in the northern hemisphere. If this pattern continues, an upsurge in cases could be anticipated starting in late 2006 or early 2007;
8. A more standardized collection of epidemiological data by countries and timely sharing of these data are needed to improve monitoring of the
situation, risk assessment, and the management of H5N1 patients.

FL Sen: Nelson Leads Harris by 35 Points

Stick a fork in her (please): According to a new Strategic Vision poll, Sen. Bill Nelson, D-Florida, leads Rep. Katherine Harris, R-Cuckooland, 61 percent to 26 percent, with 13 percent undecided.

Yesterday, we reported that Harris had announced that her colleagues in the House Democratic delegation from Florida had told her that they hoped she would beat Nelson in November.

Meanwhile, in reality:

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