Month: May 2005

Our nation’s capitol is over-run with superannuated geeks, most of whom are Republican, but among these guys there is no greater nerd than Grover Norquist, right, head of Americans for Tax Refom, a group that promotes abolishing taxation and the government it funds.

Middle-aged, bearded and paunchy, Norquist is obsessed with an intense loathing of taxation in any form or amount. Not surprisingly, he has ascended during the Bush-Rove era to become one of the leading lights on the conservative Right – in part because of his efforts to strong-arm the city’s lobbying industry into hiring Republicans.

Word comes in today’s New York Times that Norquist and his anti-tax organization have been snared in the investigation of Jack Abramoff, the $750 per hour lobbyist who is accused of defrauding his clients – a roster that includes Indian tribes – and of illegally making gifts to members of Congress, including House Majority Leader Tom DeLay.

A Congressional committee investigating whether Mr. Abramoff defrauded Indian tribes has subpoenaed records from Mr. Norquist’s group, Americans for Tax Reform, after he refused for six months to turn them over voluntarily.

As the investigation widened to include Norquist, it has also snared the Bush cabinet secretary mandated with giving corporate interests unfettered access to the natural resources of the United States:

The Justice Department is reviewing records of an advocacy group Mr. Norquist started with Gale A. Norton, now secretary of the interior, after reports that Mr. Abramoff instructed Indian tribes to give it $250,000.

Forcing native people to give money to a group whose mandate is the destruction of the land they revere is another prime example of the death of irony in these times.

If he did commit a crime, Norquist, like Abramoff and certainly Norton, will never face charges from the Bush Justice Department. These are the same folks, after all, whose non-investigation into the source of White House leaks that led to the outing of CIA operative Valerie Plame has produced no results after umpteen years.

Norquist has an interesting take on why he’s being investigated:

In interviews, Mr. Norquist dismissed any suggestion of wrongdoing on his part and said that the only reason he is “getting dragged into this” is because Senator John McCain, the head of the Senate Indian Affairs Committee, which is investigating Mr. Abramoff, holds a grudge against Mr. Norquist for campaigning for President Bush in the 2000 Republican primaries.

“McCain hates me,” he said.

Writing on AlterNet, David Morris offers some suggestions for high school science teachers to comply with the edict to teach “intelligent design” as an alternative to evolution while teaching meddling school board administrators a lesson in unintended consequences. Morris notes that many school boards across the country require science teachers to offer a critique of evolution and suggest alternative theories about the origin of life. He suggests approaching the task with creativity and impish subversion.

Then there’s the question of male homosexuality. From a Darwinian perspective, it’s a puzzle. The theory of natural selection should guarantee the disappearance of males that don’t reproduce. But they keep hanging around, in considerable numbers, in every culture and every era.

Evolutionists have their theories. Psychologist Louis A. Berman argues that it has to do with embryonic development. Medical doctor Lorne Warneke suggests that homosexuality actually offers a natural advantage. Homosexuals instill a more cooperative impulse that helps perpetuate the kinship group and tribe.

A good science teacher will follow the school board’s guidance and propose intelligent design as an alternative explanation for male homosexuality. Could there be an intelligent power that has created and nurtured male homosexuality? Does that mean God is gay?

Morris tackles the female organism (useless in Darwinism, but makes sense in intellgent design — if the designer is female) and the origin of life on the planet (intelligent design meets evolution when Erich von Daniken’s space aliens mate with our ancestors) using sex and spacemen — topics sure to garner the attention of adolescents.

It’s an interesting suggestion — take one’s frustration at having to teach mumbo-jumbo and critique accepted science and turn it into a creative synthesis that just might make students more aware, and dare we suggest, smarter.

Blistering, wonderful editorial in today’s Daytona News-Journal about Florida’s 2006 governor’s race. We’re all, it turns out, counting the days to the end of Jeb’s reign.

In 592 days, Florida gets a new governor.

Just thinking about that will put you in a good mood. Consider the possibility — a governor who wants to help not only businesses, but also citizens. A governor who would save the state’s natural beauty, not pave it. A governor who wants to fill the Capitol with good public servants, not empty out government buildings.

Don’t get me wrong. Gov. Jeb Bush isn’t all bad. He’s bright, witty and dedicated. But Bush runs state government as though it’s a conservative think tank, every action taken to comply with a hide-bound Republican ideology.

He breaks a long-standing Florida tradition of governors more concerned with solving problems than following political orthodoxy — and the state has suffered for it.

Now, that’s what I’M talking about!

English scientists have discovered that so-called farm animals are much brighter and more aware than meat eaters would prefer to think.

ABC News:

One sheep who got a reward every time she recognized a human face correctly on a video screen scored a perfect 50 out of 50.

“If it was a monkey, no one would have any problems, possibly even if it was a dog,” said Keith Kendrick, a neurologist at Babraham. “They would say, ‘Yeah, yeah, that’s expected.’ But a sheep, no one really believes.”

And it’s not just sheep.

Hamlet the pig is a computer wiz. He gets a reward every time he uses a joystick designed for a chimp to move a cursor into a blue area on a computer monitor. A Jack Russell terrier couldn’t achieve such a task after a year of trying.

…chickens can be taught to run the thermostat of the chicken coop, and even the lowly cow has a surprising inner life.

Cows have been known to form lifelong friendships, and one recent study found that they actually show excitement when they’ve learned something knew “as if they’re saying, ‘Eureka, I found out how to solve the problem,’ ” said Donald Broom, a professor at the University of Cambridge.

The reporter goes on to wonder if it’s therefore wrong to eat animals, and gets the obligatory views from both sides, with pro-carnivores taking the day with the tried and true, “Huh-huh, yeah but” argument.

Insisting they are just dumb animals with no thoughts or feelings is necessary to be able to tune out the cognitive dissonance that comes from loving animals but eating them. Anyone with a backyard bird feeder knows animals have complex lives and relationships, and problem-solve better than some humans (hey squirrels, I’m talking to you).

The argument that God put animals here for people to eat is right up there with “God put women here to serve men” and “God put black people here to ride in the holds of ships and serve white people on the other shore.”

MaxSpeak, You Listen!:

The Saddam-in-Skivvies pix reflects one or more of the following:

* An abysmal state of discipline among U.S. troops charged with a fairly important task;

* A crackpot gambit in psychological warfare directed at residual Ba’athist elements in Iraq that shows how incompetent the U.S. military is;

* An old dude who is in pretty good shape, all things considered;

* A typical entry on Craig’s List.

Former White House aide, three-time presidential candidate, commentator and magazine publisher Pat Buchanan told “The Washington Times” that “the conservative movement has passed into history. It doesn’t exist anymore as a unifying force.”

Buchanan’s definition of the term “conservative” is somewhere well to the right of Karl Rove’s. Here are a few choice quotes from the interview that illuminate Buchanan’s brand of radical conservatism.

“There is a religious war going on in our country for the soul of America. It is a cultural war, as critical to the kind of nation we will one day be as was the Cold War itself.”

“American culture has become toxic and poisonous. Take a look at what Hollywood produces today and what it produced in the 1950s. The alteration is dramatic.”

“We say we won a great victory by defeating gay marriage in 11 state-ballot referenda in November. But I think in the long run, that will be seen as a victory in defense of a citadel that eventually fell.”

“Frankly, you would not have a cultural war in this country if the Supreme Court had said, ‘Look, free speech is one thing, but pornography is not covered by the First Amendment. If the justices had stayed away from forced busing, if they had let the states decide abortion and gay rights, you would not have had the cultural war — and probably not have had the victories that the Republican Party had in the 1970s and ’80s.”

“Both major parties agreed that they would do nothing to defend the borders and that we ought to have amnesty for those who break in illegally. There was no choice. The president has abdicated his responsibility to defend America from a foreign invasion. We add half a million illegals to our population each year, most of whom come to work, some to commit crimes against American citizens. I say, look, the kind of immigrants we want are people who want to come here and become part of the American family … not just to work and then go back home.”

“Look, you’re going to have 100 million people of Hispanic, primarily Mexican, descent in the American Southwest by the middle of this century, and I think you are in danger of losing the American Southwest, de facto. I think this country is risking coming apart, like other countries in the world, over issues of language, culture and ethnicity.”