More on the GOP SOTU Response: Tea Bagger Technology Went Askew Again, the White House Punked Rubio and Rubio Failed At De-Romneyfication for His Party

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On her show Wednesday night, Rachel Maddow dissected the Republicans’ response to Pres. Obama’s State of the Union speech and found that it was even worse than it first appeared:

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Chris Matthews: Rubio’s SOTU Rebuttal Was Like ‘Something You Would Hear on a High School Debating Team’

Chris Matthews’ take on Florida GOP Sen. Marco Rubio’s rebuttal to the president’s State of the Union speech Tuesday night was solid gold:

CHRIS MATTHEWS: I thought it was Tinkertoys. I thought it was primitive, something you would hear on a high school debating team … First of all, he went after government as some kind evil, then he admitted he had gone to school on student loans. Well, I went to school on student loans. My dad went to school on the GI Bill. Most of us have benefited from good government. Government’s worked for us. I got in the Peace Corps, changed my life. I mean, I’m very pro-government. And he admitted he was, too. He said, I love Medicare because of how it takes care of my mother, how it took care of my father with dignity. He said, I went the student loan route. I got my education. Where was the consistency here? I didn’t get it. He was saying he was a product of solid government and positive programs, and then he just trashed the whole thing.

And then he played the victim game that everybody seems to play. What’s the Republicans victims? They’re paying one in six dollars now, we have about 15 percent of GDP going to revenues. We’re spending 25 percent, who is being over-taxed? I mean, what are they talking about?

It was almost like a YAF-er convention speech, Young Americans for Freedom speech, from the 1950s. There was no originality to it. It was basic. Again, it was Tinkertoys. It was a kid’s presentation of a philosophy reduced to maybe the 9th grade level. I’m sorry, that’s what it was.

Rubio’s ‘Shaky And Sweaty’ Performance Was the Worst GOP Rebuttal Since Gov. Jindal Channeled Kenneth the Page

In his rebuttal to Pres. Obama’s State of the Union speech last night, Florida GOP Sen. Marco Rubio delivered the worst political performance on the national stage since, well, Oct. 3 — and the worst GOP rebuttal since Louisiana GOP Gov. Bobby Jindal unintentionally imitated Kenneth the Page on “30 Rock” when he delivered the rebuttal to the president’s first address to Congress in February 2009.

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The Rubio Water Bottle Moment

No wonder this move by Sen. Marco Rubio (GOP/Tea – Fla.) blew up Twitter, and according to Buzzfeed’s Andrew Kaczynski has inspired 15 parody accounts, and counting. Seriously, what the heck was that all about?

From the Twitter:

  • @Mediaite – Historic Thirst: Marco Rubio Becomes His Own State Of The Union Drinking Game
  • @BeachPeanuts – #Rubio’s SOTU Rebuttal Tough To Swallow
  • @JimmyFavors – Fun fact: Lying makes you thirsty.
  • @politico – Marco Rubio’s drinking problem
  • @ryanaclarke – Stay thirsty, my friends.
  • @ProgressFlorida – Tonight’s biggest loser? Zephyrhills bottled water, dissed by their own senator for a Maine brand.
  • @rudepundit – ha I thought he was going to pull Ted Nugent up on stage
  • @LOLGOP – I’m been more impressed if Marco Rubio kept talking as Jeb Bush sipped water.

And finally, the tweet that really mattered:

@NickKristof – Marco Rubio could make a more credible response to Obama if he hadn’t voted today against Violence Against Women Act.

Indicted Former Chair of the Republican Party of Florida Pleads Guilty

Greer’s mug shot
Big news out of Florida today:

Ousted former Florida GOP chairman Jim Greer Monday abruptly ended what was expected to be a painful unpeeling of state party secrets by entering a surprise guilty plea to five criminal charges.

Greer, 50, of Oviedo, was facing a possible 75 years in prison for fraud, money laundering and theft. Now he faces a possible maximum sentence of 35 years.

If Circuit Judge Marc Lubet hands down a recommended sentence, spelled out by state guidelines, he’ll give Greer 3 1/2 years in prison.

The deal Greer cut did not include an agreement on his sentence, a likely mix of prison time and probation. That’s to be decided at a March 27 hearing.

He’ll remain free until then…

A lot of top Republicans in Florida politics are breathing sighs of release tonight:

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Knowing Another Boy Scout is Gay Will Turn Your Son Gay Too

The biggest problem will be a wave of boy-on-boy sexual activity on campouts and other overnight trips…Truth be told, there are scouts and leaders who are gay. But they have to be appropriately private and discreet about their sexuality and not “loud and proud.” Imagine openly gay men kissing and snuggling around the campfire in front of young boys.

John Stemberger, president of the Florida Family Policy Council, apparently a haven for homophobes. Stemberger made the remarks in an editorial in USA Today, which claimed he was an Eagle Scout and scoutmaster. Something tells us that Stemberger has already spent quite a bit of time imagining openly gay men kissing and snuggling around the campfire. Please note: Stemberger was allowed to be an Eagle Scout, but that gay kid in California wasn’t.

Tea Bagger U.S. Rep. Says Immigrants Want the Free Stuff

But the small amount of information I received is that [Obama] criticized what Sen. Rubio and some of his colleagues did, because he said they had all these enforcement provisions, and the president doesn’t want that. He basically wants to move in to legalization and citizenship immediately. That’s not something that I would support. It’s also not something that I think we can afford. Because once you’re a legal American citizen, you’re going to have access to the new health care subsidies, you’re going to have access to the welfare state.

— U.S. Rep. Ron DeSantis (GOP/Tea), one of Florida’s new Congress members, explaining to constituents at a town hall meeting how he differs with the president on immigration. DeSantis seems to assume that people want to become Americans for the easy money.

Rick Scott Bribing Florida Teachers

We’re surprised he didn’t throw in a promise of dark chocolate, red wine and foot massages.

— Orlando Sentinel editorial writers, noting the amazing about-face by Florida Gov. Rick Scott (GOP/Tea), who announced this week a $2,500 across the board bonus for teachers. The editorial, titled, “Teacher Pay Proposal Smacks of Political Bribe,” reminds readers that Scott slashed teacher pay and school funding when he came to office, and is only increasing it now because that move and others have lead to his record low popularity. Scott will seek re-election in 2014, with what stands now at a 36% positive approval rating.