PR Humor – August 15, 2005 – The collection of items that will go into the George W. Bush Presidential Liberry can easily fit into two Office Depot file boxes, which is where the items are stored now, in a closet just off the Oval Office.

And yet no less than eight public organizations in Texas are vying for the honor of being the repository of the contents of the boxes.

The inventory of the contents is classified “Double Super Secret,” but a source who has seen the boxes, and who spoke to Pensito Review on the condition of anonymity, described them as “old and sort of yellowed,” and “wrapped up tight in duct tape.”

Speculating on the contents, the source said he guessed there were some comic books and baseball cards and a couple of private school annuals, a Harken Oil Company composition book containing handwritten notes, some bumperstickers and other political campaign memorabilia and a baseball team pennant.

The boxes contain at least one VHS videotape, we’re told – and, no it’s not “Debbie Does Dallas,” more like “Field of Dreams.”

All other documents generated during the Bush presidency “are shredded before they are read,” said the source.

Even with this paucity of materials to be housed in the next presidential library, the construction budget for the facility is upwards of $200 million.

USAToday reports that “seven colleges or universities and the city of Arlington, Texas, have until Sept. 15 to submit proposals for the library… Three Bush insiders — former Commerce secretary and longtime Bush pal Don Evans, the president’s brother Marvin and Craig Stapleton, husband of a Bush cousin — will recommend finalists. Then Bush will make the final decision, thrilling one community and disappointing the others.”

But it isn’t too late to get in on the bidding, so if you live in Texas and you have a spare closet or room enough in your backyard to add a small shed – and you could use $200 million tax free – get your proposal together and send it to the Liberry Search, White House, 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, Washington DC 20500.

Connect: