GOP Dream Ticket for 2008: Dick Cheney & Montgomery Burns

Cheney and Mr. Burns: Separated at Birth?

There’s an uncanny resemblance between one Dick Cheney and dreaded Simpsons power plant owner Montgomery Burns. Besides their obvious physical similarities, the two share the same philosophy, the same outlook on life. Just read these quotes from Mr. Burns and see if they don’t remind you of a certain someone:

“What good is money if it can’t inspire terror in your fellow man?”

“Smithers… we have to stop dumping our nuclear waste in the playground, all those bald children are starting to raise suspicion.”

“Smithers, this is a golden opportunity. If we get him alive, we can put him on Broadway. Dead and we can sell monkey stew to the army!”

“Just give the great unwashed a pair of oversized breasts and a happy ending, and they’ll ‘oink’ for more every time.”

“Oh, so Mother Nature needs a favor? Well, maybe she should have thought of that when she was besetting us with droughts and floods and poison monkeys. Nature started the fight for survival and she wants to quit because she’s losing? Well, I say Hard cheese!”

O.K., Mr. Burns doesn’t have the Cheney potty mouth nailed down, but there’s still a LOT of similarity. I think Dick is leading a double life.

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