If Bush Tax Cuts Don’t Kill Economy, Congress Will

Speaker Freckles, Senate Majority Leader Fluffy, Rep. Peanut, and Sen. Blackie
Let me see if I’ve got this straight. The economy is in recession following years of wild spending on private contractors and unwanted embassies in Bush’s Iraq occupation, combined with tax cuts for the very rich. So what are we are going to do about it? Give everyone a tax rebate, plunging us even deeper into debt. Or, as Dartmouth Economics Prof. Andrew A. Samwick put it:
It is ironic that additional borrowing is prescribed as the remedy for a malady that arose from unwise borrowing.
Everyone loves Ronald Reagan now that he’s really dead so let’s bring back this old favorite: voodoo economics. That was the counterintuitive scheme that said money rich people were no longer contributing for the public good would trickle down and benefit us working stiffs. It caused Reagan’s successor, Bush Jr.’s father, to ban lip-reading and raise taxes, but we still wallowed in recession until Bill Clinton forced us to spend within our means.
So here we are again. But Samwick notes there’s a new buzzword this time.
Let’s drop the euphemism of “stimulus package” and call this agreement by its proper name: “deficit spending.”
When you and I get our $300, we will have two choices: go to Wal-mart and blow it on more cheap crap from China, or use it to pay down our credit card bills. Neither option stimulates our economy, although I’m sure the Chinese will laugh gleefully.
Wait, it gets better. Bush originally called for a “tax rebate,” which would imply that those receiving a check had actually paid into the system to begin with. But thanks to the bunny rabbits in Congress whose only concern is staying in office, coverage is now extended to retirees and people on public assistance, who never paid any taxes. And — hold on to your hat — even people who don’t live in this country.

Heath Ledger, 2006 Academy Award nominee for his role in “Brokeback Mountain,” 

