Tag: Conservative Values

Pat Robertson calling for your murder can be a good thing. A South Florida newspaper is reporting a new spirit of unity among critics and fans of Venezuelan Pres. Hugo Chavez. Both groups now agree on one thing: Pat Robertson is ape shit.

Sun Sentinel:

Some of Chávez’s most ardent opponents, who once led street marches back home but are now exiled in South Florida, said the comments were inappropriate and will further fuel tensions between the two countries.

“I think Chávez will grab this thread and make himself out to be the victim and justify the idea there are international groups that want to kill him,” said Carlos Fernandez, a Weston [Florida] resident and former opposition leader who helped lead a 2002 national strike that shut down Venezuela’s petroleum production.

…some wondered if Robertson was paid to make such an outlandish comment.

“I wonder if someone paid Robertson to say such a thing so Chávez could be vindicated,” said Ernesto Ackerman, founder of Independent Venezuelan American Citizens. “Otherwise those are the comments of a madman.”

[…]

“We have the purpose of preventing bigots and ignoramuses from controlling the education of the United States.”

– Clarence Darrow, in 1925, unsuccessfully defending science teacher John Scopes, on trial for teaching evolution rather than creationism (a.k.a. “intelligent design”) in a Tennessee public school.

“How can anyone think this way? You know, ‘Shutting down Guantánamo and giving suspected terrorists legal protections would help restore our reputation abroad.’ No, it wouldn’t. I mean that’s like saying, well, if we’re nicer to the people who want to KILL US, then the other people who want to KILL US will like us more. Does that make any sense to you? Do you think Osama [bin Laden] is gonna be more favorably disposed to the U.S. if we give the Guantánamo people lawyers? … I mean, but this is what they’re saying. It is just — you just sit there, you go, ‘They’ll never get it until they grab Michael Kinsley out of his little house and they cut his head off.’ And maybe when the blade sinks in, he’ll go, ‘Perhaps O’Reilly was right.‘

– Bill O’Reilly

Silly Democrats!! The governor just took a few illegal contributions. It’s not like he did something really egregious like lying about sex:

Ohio’s House Democrats are considering impeachment proceedings against Republican Gov. Bob Taft, who pleaded no contest last week to four ethics violations…

An article of impeachment would have to be approved by a majority of the 99-member House, something the Democrats — who hold 39 seats — couldn’t achieve without the votes of at least 11 Republicans. If passed, an impeachment trial would be held in the GOP-controlled Senate.

Senate President Bill Harris said Sunday that talk of impeachment is unwarranted.

“Unless some other types of charges develop, I don’t think there will be an attempt to impeach the governor,” said Harris, a Republican. “I think he’ll continue to do his best and continue to work hard.”

NB to Gov. Taft: Better avoid sexual activity until your term is over. Remember – the leaders of your party are watching you!!

Yesterday, televangelist and wingnuttus emeritus Pat Robertson looked into a camera on the set of his faux news program “The 700 Club” and advised the Bush Administration to assassinate Hugo Chavez, the democratically elected as the president of Venezuela:

“You know, I don’t know about this doctrine of assassination, but if he thinks we’re trying to assassinate him, I think that we really ought to go ahead and do it,” Mr. Robertson said. “It’s a whole lot cheaper than starting a war . . . and I don’t think any oil shipments will stop.”

Robertson, the 75-year old leading light of the Christianist extremist movement in the United States, offered this rationale for murdering President Chavez:

“We have the ability to take him out, and I think the time has come that we exercise that ability… We don’t need another $200-billion war to get rid of one, you know, strong-arm dictator.

“It’s a whole lot easier to have some of the covert operatives do the job and then get it over with.”

WWJD, indeed.

At the beginning of President Bush’s inappropriately long summer vacation, the White House message machine produced a list of books the president would be reading in his downtime.

The list included “Salt: A World History;” “Alexander II: The Last Great Tsar;” and “The Great Influenza: The Epic Story of the Deadliest Plague in History.”

Yeah right. And if you believe that, send me an email – I’ve got a solid line on some oxycontin for your pal Rush.

Last week, we reported that a number of universities in Texas were vying to be the home of President Bush’s “liberry.” We know that Pensito Review has a mysterious but faithful reader from in the federal gubmint (Hi there!) but we’re not so full of oursevles that we think our ribbing the president because he his a lamebrain caused his flying monkeys to make up a fake reading list that same day.

President Bush isn’t reading anything this summer. To relax, he watches back episodes of MTV’s “Punk’d” series in which Ashton Kutcher pulls elaborate practical jokes on his Hollywood friends. Watching Justin Timberlake cry and call for his mommy when he’s “punk’d” into believing the IRS is repossessing his house is simply priceless. That’s something that would appeal to Bush’s inner fratboy. (And since he doesn’t read at all, he probably doesn’t know that his daughters, Jenna and Barbara, allegedly indulged in “underage drinking” and pot smoking and Kutcher’s home in Hollywood back in 2001.)

The reading list is a lie. There is no evidence to support the fact that a recalcitrant dunce like George W. Bush could wade through these books – or even the Cliff Notes versions thereof.

So who buys this crap?

[…]

“I know I’m wasting my precious time writing you, but here goes: Funny how the question of Cindy Sheehan can generate such a large e-mail response (8/21), yet you can only find one in support of her activities. Funny how you can criticize her for being a tool of the Left when you have no problem being the flagship tool of the Right. Funny how you can be such positive cheerleaders for this Administration while it is obvious that the ship of state is sinking and it’s every man for himself.”

– Scott from Richmond, Virginia, posting on Brian Wilson’s FOXNews.com blog

Washington Post:

The U.S. attorney in San Diego is trying to seize Rep. Randy “Duke” Cunningham’s California home, asserting in a sealed civil suit that it was purchased with proceeds from a violation of the bribery statute.

The reference to the federal bribery law in a forfeiture claim filed in court and with San Diego County is the first official indication of the direction of a probe of the California Republican’s relationship with a Washington defense contractor.

A federal grand jury has been investigating Cunningham since the San Diego Union-Tribune reported in June that the contractor, Mitchell J. Wade, had purchased the congressman’s home in late 2003 for $1.675 million and resold it several months later at a $700,000 loss. Cunningham soon bought a larger house in Rancho Santa Fe for $2.55 million.

Cunningham also lived rent free while in Washington on Wade’s 42-foot yacht, the Duke-Stir.

Montgomery Independent:

Sen. John McCain’s inquiry into the looting of nearly $100 million in American Indian gambling revenues by lobbyists Jack Abramoff, Grover Norquist, Michael Scanlon and Ralph Reed [has allegedly revealed] that millions of dollars from tribes with gambling facilities found their way into the hands of the Christian Coalition, the Coalition Against Gambling Expansion and others who were using the Indian funding, particularly money from the Mississippi Choctaws, to fight a lottery and video gaming in Alabama.

Beyond the question of illegalities, this presents an ethical problem for the Christian Coalition of Alabama because it’s president, John Giles, has been asked repeatedly – and under oath – over the years to disclose whether his organization took donations from gaming groups. Giles reportedly always answered that no gambling money, either directly or indirectly, had ever flowed to the Christian Coalition of Alabama in its six-year fight against the twin sins of a state lottery and video poker.

“I’d have to resign tomorrow,” Giles told one lawmaker in 2003, because while it might not be illegal to take gaming money, it would be unethical.