Dutch Firm Baa-Ttles Local Mayor Over Ads
AMSTERDAM, Netherlands – A Dutch company that is blanketing roadside sheep with its logo faces a $60,000 fine — but said Monday it’s the mayor of a small town nearby who should feel sheepish for trying to ban the ad campaign. The company said the mayor was a wolf in sheep’s clothing, to which the mayor responded that the company was just trying to pull the wool over the public’s eyes in the escalating contest of sheep-related puns begun by an Associated Press intern.
Many Mexicans Ignore Presidential Campaign
MEXICO CITY – An old joke is being recycled in the Mexican capital as the campaign gears up for the July presidential elections: “If the three main candidates were together in a plane crash, who would survive?” In America, we have a similar old joke: “If the two main presidential candidates went quail hunting with Dick Cheney, who would survive?”
Vatican to Issue Document on Condom Use
VATICAN CITY – At Pope Benedict XVI’s request, the Vatican is preparing a document about condom use by those with AIDS, a top cardinal said in a published interview. Among condom uses the pope is expected to approve are water balloons, mop-handle grips and stick-shift dust covers.
Sorbonne Reopens After Weeks of Protests
PARIS – Students returned to classes past police vans Monday as the landmark Sorbonne University in Paris reopened after being closed for six weeks amid protests of a youth labor law that mired France in crisis. They even have a term for it in French — “coupure de ressort” (spring break).
Chavez: U.S. Diplomat Welcome in Venezuela
CARACAS, Venezuela – Venezuela’s president said Sunday that he would welcome a visit by a top U.S. State Department official and hopes to build close ties with like-minded Americans despite his vehement opposition to President Bush. While hinting that he would prefer a visit from “That eye-candy Condi Rice,” Chavez defined “like-minded Americans” as “ultra-left-wing authoritarian neo-communist autocratic whack-jobs.”
Does the Vatican really expect church members afflicted with HIV/AIDS to heed its instructions about condom use? And if they do follow the Vatican’s rules, will they then be elgible to make it through the pearly gates, or do they receive a one way ticket to fry in hell. Yet undetermined is whether the condoms that get the Vatican’s blessing will be required paraphernalia for alter-boy-buggering priests.