Texas Sites Vying for W’s Presidential Liberry

PR Humor – August 15, 2005 – The collection of items that will go into the George W. Bush Presidential Liberry can easily fit into two Office Depot file boxes, which is where the items are stored now, in a closet just off the Oval Office.

And yet no less than eight public organizations in Texas are vying for the honor of being the repository of the contents of the boxes.

The inventory of the contents is classified “Double Super Secret,” but a source who has seen the boxes, and who spoke to Pensito Review on the condition of anonymity, described them as “old and sort of yellowed,” and “wrapped up tight in duct tape.”

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Chairman Dean: Bush Can’t Handle the Facts

“It never pays to ignore facts. Reason we’re in trouble in Iraq? The President didn’t care what the facts were. The reason we have an almost $8 trillion national debt? The President didn’t care what the facts were. The facts matter. The truth is you can’t run a business, a state, a country or a family if you don’t care what the facts are.”

— Howard Dean, Chairman of the Democratic National Committee

Eveybody But Bush Knows That the Iraq War Is Over

“Nothing that happens on the ground in Iraq can turn around the fate of this war in America: not a shotgun constitution rushed to meet an arbitrary deadline, not another Iraqi election, not higher terrorist body counts, not another battle for Falluja (where insurgents may again regroup, The Los Angeles Times reported last week). A citizenry that was asked to accept tax cuts, not sacrifice, at the war’s inception is hardly in the mood to start sacrificing now. There will be neither the volunteers nor the money required to field the wholesale additional American troops that might bolster the security situation in Iraq.”

— Frank Rich in the New York Times

Bush CIA Leak Prosecutor Brought in Because of Aschcroft’s Meddling and Doubts about Rove’s Story

Rove did not disclose that he had ever discussed Plame with Time reporter Matthew Cooper, and investigators were skeptical of Rove’s claims that he first learned Plame’s CIA status from a journalist – because he said he could not recall the name of the journalist.

Village Voice:

Justice Department officials made the crucial decision in late 2003 to appoint a special prosecutor to investigate the leak of the identity of undercover CIA officer Valerie Plame in large part because investigators had begun to specifically question the veracity of accounts provided to them by White House deputy chief of staff Karl Rove, according to senior law enforcement officials.

Several of the federal investigators were also deeply concerned that then attorney general John Ashcroft was personally briefed regarding the details of at least one FBI interview with Rove, despite Ashcroft’s own longstanding personal and political ties to Rove, the Voice has also learned. The same sources said Ashcroft was also told that investigators firmly believed that Rove had withheld important information from them during that FBI interview…

During his initial interview with the FBI, in the fall of 2003, Rove did not disclose that he had ever discussed Plame with Time magazine correspondent Matthew Cooper, according to two legal sources with firsthand knowledge of the matter. Federal investigators were also skeptical of claims by Rove that he had only first learned of Plame’s employment with the CIA from a journalist, even though he also claimed he could not specifically recall the name of the journalist.

And So It Starts: U.S. Intelligence Documents Show Iran as Source of Iraq Bombs

“An Iranian-backed network of insurgents in Iraq is responsible for a new type of lethal roadside bomb, part of plans by Tehran to influence its neighbor that began even before the U.S. invasion, Time magazine reported on Sunday. Citing a U.S. military intelligence document, the magazine said that over the past eight months, a network of insurgents led by a man named Abu Mustafa al-Sheibani had introduced bombs based on a design from the Iranian-backed Lebanese militia Hizbollah that can easily pierce battle tank armor. The document estimated that al-Sheibani’s team comprised 280 members divided into 17 bomb-making teams and death squads, Time said.”

— Reuters

Not So Coincidentally…

“President Bush’s standing with an American public anxious about Iraq and the nation’s direction is lower than that of the last two men who won re-election to the White House — Ronald Reagan and Bill Clinton — at this point in their second terms.”

— Associated Press

Only Liberals Complain about Gas Prices, Bush Adviser Says

Second quarter earnings for oil companies:

  • Exxon Mobil Corp. up 35 percent from last year to $7.64 billion
  • BP up 29 percent, to $5.59 billion
  • Royal Dutch Shell up 34 percent to $5.24 billion
  • ConocoPhillips up a whopping 51 percent to $3.14 billion

PR HUMOR — August 14, 2005 — With the price of gasoline rising toward $3 per gallon, a senior administration official told Pensito Review today that while President George W. Bush is “troubled” by the potential effect of high energy prices on the nation’s productivity, there is nothing the President or anyone can do because “oil prices fluctuate due to forces of nature. It’s out of man’s control, similar to hurricanes or earthquakes.”

The price of oil is “in God’s hands,” said the Bush adviser, who spoke on the condition of anonymity. He described Americans as “people of faith,” who have “faith in this President.”

The administration’s hands-off approach on oil prices has broad appeal, the senior official said. The indicator of this is the general lack of outrage over recent price spikes. He said that most of the complaints have come from “a few liberals” who “always blame America for everything.”

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THE TICKER – Duke’s defense :: Injustice Sunday :: Kansas hates science

  • Duke asks donors to pay for his criminal defense: Rep. Randy “Duke” Cunningham (R-Calif.) can’t keep his fingers out of the honey pot, no matter how many times the bees sting him. Now he is asking defense contractors – the very group prosecutors say bribed him – to pay for his criminal defense. Since the Dukester is not running next year, it’s hard to figure why they would.
  • True believers speak out against Christianists: Liberal religious leaders criticized their extremist co-religionists’ rally to back U.S. Supreme Court nominee John Roberts and said wingnuts should not drag religion into his confirmation fight. These folks need to speak up more before Christianity becomes synonymous with intolerance – again.
  • Kansas embarrasses itself on evolution: After months of silly and useless debate, the Kansas Board of Education has moved closer to making their state a national embarassment by approving the teaching of Creationism to its students. The state motto of Alabama used to be “Thank God for Mississippi.” Now Mississippi can say, “Thank God for Kansas.”

Sheehan’s Vigil Is Working – Conservative Slime Machine out in Force, with More to Come

Fred Barnes, editor of The Weekly Standard – and the biggest jerk and rightwing tool on the public stage now that Robert Novak has been sidelined – described Sheehan as a “kook.”

It’s hard to imagine how conservatives can look at themselves in the mirror these days. Their knee jerk reaction to any criticism of their Dear Leader – who is by far the worst president in United States history – is to change the subject away from the substance of the criticism by sliming the critic, no matter who it is.

But can they take this too far? Sure. Will they? Absolutely. Have they crossed the line by sliming Cindy Sheehan, the liberal activist “Peace Mom?” It’s too soon to say. But the sliming of Cindy has certainly begun.

It started on Thursday, when Fred Barnes, editor of The Weekly Standard – and the biggest jerk and rightwing tool on the public stage now that Robert Novak has been sidelined – described Sheehan as a “kook.”

If she is, Fred, what are you?

And there’s more…

John Podhoretz called her protest “political theater” [in] National Review’s blog, The Corner.

This morning, the Drudge Report posted a banner headline, claiming “BUSH PROTESTING MOM CALLS FOR ‘ISRAEL OUT OF PALESTINE’; VOWS NOT TO PAY TAXES.”

And conservative columnist and blogger Michelle Malkin put up an “unconfirmed report” that Sheehan’s husband, Patrick, had filed for a divorce.

Vince is Going Back

But we do contemplate it, all of it. Somewhere deep inside we know it’s happening RIGHT NOW, and we think about it. It’s a weight around our hearts, pulling us down, and hurting, hurting, hurting. Cindy Sheehan reminds us of this hurt. President Bush ignores it, goes on about his dude ranch holiday, puts one foot in front of the other, head down. But we know. We know.

We have a problem. We have a black cloud over our head, a shadow over our conscience, and a question mark over our future. Iraq is sucking the joy, the spirit, the courage out of us.

I bet you’re like me. When you get pissed off about the traffic and your idiot fellow drivers and long check-out lines and people who seem to be taking out a mortgage instead of twenty bucks at the ATM, a little voice in your head says, “Yeah, but at least I have electricity. At least I can buy stuff. At least I can drive down the road without bombs going off.” And like me, you feel more guilt than gratitude.

I work part-time at UPS. One of the drivers and I have a thing, a fun thing, where we pretend to be boyfriend and girlfriend. Vince is black and at least 10 years younger than my 40-something white self. If I look nice one day, instead of just saying, “You look nice today,” Vince says, “Baby! Did you wear that for me?” and I assure him I did. When I rag him about an irate customer and her petulant demands, he cuts me off and asks, “I’ll see you at the house later, right Shorty?” and I assure him he will.

We kicked off our friendship when I was unknowingly the third person to message him about the same annoying thing on a bad day and he called me from the road to tell me exactly how much I pissed him off. After he hung up on me, I found out he was right to be indignant and messaged him my regret. In the meantime, he thought about it too and reached the same conclusion, but in reverse, so when he came in that night he apologized to me for, “getting all Army on your ass.” I asked him what that meant.

Vince has already been to Iraq once, at the start of this mess. That should have been enough, but he spent three weeks in Georgia in July training for redeployment. He knows this is the deal he made. Vince has two years to go before he has his 20 years in. His little girl just turned 4, and from the pictures he’s so proud to show, is the spitting image of her dad, only prettier. His partner doesn’t want him to go back but knows she can no more end his service than his annual Kentucky Derby bets.

I don’t want Vince to go back. I don’t want anyone to go. I don’t want one more single, solitary person to go. It hurts to even think about it.

I want Iraq to just stop. I flinch when a 38-year-old guy in the reserves, like Vince, is killed because I know he’s got a family, a community, a good life in progress. The picture on the news of the just-killed 19-year-old hayseed with a grim expression posed in front of the flag makes me imagine the parents somewhere who never saw this coming, never thought he’d die after all the hard work of raising him was just easing off. The dead female soldiers – who smile radiantly in their pictures no matter what their age, young mothers or not – are especially hard. And it’s just too painful to think about the vast Iraqi death toll.

But we do contemplate it, all of it. Somewhere deep inside we know it’s happening RIGHT NOW, and we think about it. It’s a weight around our hearts, pulling us down, and hurting, hurting, hurting. Cindy Sheehan reminds us of this hurt. President Bush ignores it, goes on about his dude ranch holiday, puts one foot in front of the other, head down. But we know. We know.