Boy, it’s a hard to pick someone to root for in this fight. In his new autobiography, “I Am a Lying Snake, and I Know It,”* former Senate Majority Leader Trent Lott (R-Lynching) has shellacked the current Majority Leader, Sen. Bill Frist (R-Medical Industry) for back-stabbing him after Lott fatally wounded himself by wishing out loud that the late Sen. Strom Thurmond (R-South Hypocrisy) and his pro-lynching Dixiecrat party had won the presidency in 1948.
After Lott’s fall from grace, Frist – who has admitted killing kittens for fun – was given Lott’s job by the White House, after a pro-forma vote by the GOP Bush-lickers in the Senate.
In his memoir, Lott describes his laudatory comments about a would-be Thurmond presidency as “innocent and thoughtless” and blames the media for reporting his remarks. He has a point. After all, what he said was absolutely true. The United States would have been been much better off if Thurmond had been president instead of Republican Dwight Eisenhower – if you define the “United States” as “white males,” as Republicans do.
In the book, Lott reportedly blames his conservatism on liberal professors at Yale who apparently tried to make him feel guilty about his racism – but instead made him devote his life to preserving white supremacy.
Lott most recently made headlines by joining the Senate’s Pro-Lynching Caucus – handful of Southern senators who refused to sign onto a resolution expressing regret for the Senate’s refusal to outlaw lynching in the 1960’s and before.
*Okay, obviously, that’s not the real title. It’s “Does My Hair Look Real?”
