Trump depicting himself as Jesus is a sign of our broken zeitgeist,
At the same time, his picking a fight with Pope Leo just isn’t nice.
But we can see how the president got confused,
See, Donald Trump has grown quite used
To people exclaiming — following his words or deeds — “Jesus Christ!”
Trump’s war in Iran is over and won, and now we’ve got it made,
But the Strait of Hormuz is still closed, and that’s affecting trade.
So what is Trump’s solution
To a stand-off without resolution?
Why, the United States will just impose an extra double-secret naval blockade.
It’s all over for Hungary’s dictator, Viktor Orban,
For 16 years he was the country’s hard-right strongman.
But democracy’s a stubborn bitch,
And voters wanted a liberal switch,
And that’s how Hungary’s Viktor Orban got shit-canned.
The U.S. and Iran met in Islamabad to give peace a chance,
They came out of the meeting looking at each other askance.
The meeting did no good,
And further soured the mood,
But what could you expect after meeting for 21 hours with JD Vance.
FEMA executive Greg Phillips used to be a complete unknown,
But that was before he started using teleportation to roam.
He entered some spiritual portal,
To transport 50 miles across Georgia,
But no one ever saw him at any of the three Waffle Houses of Rome.
