We elected a black guy — the current White House resident.
If we elect Hillary, that would set a female precedent.
But it would incite mayhem,
If we elect Lindsey Graham,
Because the U.S. isn’t ready yet for a gay president.
Why women gather in the powder room remains a mystery
To a real man’s man like Big Mike Huckabee.
Guys can go fishin’
And guys can go huntin’,
But a REAL man walks alone when he gets up to pee.
Guys like to go fishing with other men. They like to go hunting with other men. Women like to go to the restroom with other women. I don’t get that. I can tell you this much: if I ever say, ‘I have to go to the restroom’ and some guy says, ‘I’ll go with you,’ he ain’t goin’ with me. That much I know.
— Mike Huckabee, quoted by TPM at a speech in Iowa.
If his wife Michele is elected president next year and he becomes America’s first male First Lady, Marcus “Jazzy Hands” Bachmann says he will not pursue a socialist cause like Michelle Obama’s campaign to improve childhood nutrition. Instead, perhaps not surprisingly, his cause will be preventing equal marriage rights for gays:
“I’ve decided my cause is not going to be happy meals,” he said during a stop at the Family Table Restaurant here, apparently a dig at Mrs. Obama.
“We are going to be the message-givers,” said Mr. Bachmann, who runs a Christian counseling service that has been accused of trying to “heal” gays by persuading them to become heterosexual.
“We are going to get this message across,” he said. “Marriage is between one man and one woman. We are going to promote families.”
Meanwhile, Jonathan Chait suggests that Michele’s presidential aspirations have become such a long shot that she’s now pinning her hopes on being named Mitt Romney’s running mate. “Obviously,” writes Chait, “you’d have to be delusional to think that Romney would put a massive liability like Bachmann on his ticket. Luckily for him, Bachmann is delusional.”
At the Republican presidential debate this week in Sioux City, Iowa, Bachmann earned an astounding twelfth “Pants on Fire” from Politifact for lying when she said, “PolitiFact came out and said that everything I said was true” in the prior debate. Politifact says it said no such thing.
The blowback from the hate-filled ad targeting Iowa’s Christian bigot voters that Rick Perry released this week has been pretty hilarious.
It has spawned all sorts of parodies, including the video above, as well as a Tumblr site and a series of Photoshop jobs in which gay icons like Tinky Winky, the late Rev. Jerry Falwell’s favorite Teletubby, are superimposed behind Perry.
And speaking of gay icons, here is a Dept. of There Are No Accidents alert: In the ad, Perry is costumed in a jacket just like the one worn by Heath Ledger in “Brokeback Mountain.”
But the blowback hasn’t been all fun and games for Rick Perry. On Wednesday, Tony Fabrizio, team Perry’s pollster and strategist, was outed on Twitter — “twouted?” — by Jimmy LaSalvia and Chris Barron, prominent members of GOProud, a Stockholm-syndrome support group for gay Republicans:
George Alan Rekers is a prototypical professional homophobe. He is a founding board member of the Family Research Council, a well-funded anti-gay organization that the Southern Poverty Law Center has labeled a hate group; an officer for NARTH, the National Association for Research & Therapy of Homosexuality, a pseudo-scientific group that disseminates anti-gay disinformation disguised as research; and a researcher for the American College of Pediatricians, which, despite its legitimate-sounding name, has been described as a “phony medical group attempting to peddle anti-gay propaganda to schools.”