Gov for Sale
Californians, you are cool and hip;
You have granola and relationships.
But would one of you please tell
For how much you plan to sell
Meg Whitman the governorship?
Californians, you are cool and hip;
You have granola and relationships.
But would one of you please tell
For how much you plan to sell
Meg Whitman the governorship?
Newt Gingrich and his right-wing brethren
Think they’ve hatched a plan that can win.
They’ll play their race cards
As they’re trying so hard
To make folks believe Obama’s a Kenyan.
Terry Jones and his church are a bunch of dumb Crackers,
Islamophobic haters and mean ol’ attackers.
But with a tip of the hat,
You’ve got to hand it to them that
They’re a savvy bunch of media hijackers.
Is it right to burn the Quran
Just because the First Amendment says you can?
And if in response Muslim fanatics
Pull some mean terrorist antics,
Should you consult your Bible for an exit plan?
It’s kind of weird for the president to say,
“They talk about me like a dog” (Republican “they”).
But if they keep on doing it,
There will be nothing else for it,
We’ll just have to call out the ASPCA.
I’m not saying he doesn’t deserve to live,
I’m just saying his polls tend to be negative.
I’m not saying he’s right,
I’m just saying he’s RIGHT,
And his stats always help the conservatives.
Al Sharpton left me feeling bored
And listening to Sarah Palin’s a chore.
But hey, what the heck,
Thanks to Glenn Beck,
Today, I feel like my honor’s restored.
They’re gathering on the Washington Mall,
The right-wingers, tea-baggers and all.
No matter how peaceful it seems,
This wasn’t MLK’s dream —
It’s the nightmare of Glenn Beck’s goddamn gall.
In Florida, the primary was hot,
With candidates trading potshots.
The voters, of course,
Might feel some remorse,
When they sell the governorship to Rick Scott.
Jane Spahr is a good Presbyterian
Who’s accused of being a contrarian.
The church laid the charges
For eleven gay marriages,
After she was sanctioned for marryin’ lesbians.