BBC: ‘Gay’ Means ‘Rubbish’

And “fags” means “cigarettes”: According to a short in The Hollywood Reporter, the BBC Board of Governors has ruled that the word ” ‘gay’ now means ‘rubbish’ in modern playground-speak and need not be offensive to homosexuals.”

Wonder how all the rubbish people are taking that ….

Apparently this all came about after a listener complained when a morning talk-show host dismissed a cell phone ringtone with the remark, “I don’t want that one, it’s gay.”

The BBC’s program complaints committee noted, “The word ‘gay’ … is often now used to mean ‘lame’ or ‘rubbish.’ This is a widespread current usage of the word amongst young people.”

Who needs “gay” anyway, when we’ve got so many other descriptive adjectives available?

Quote du Jour

No case whatever can be made out for the statement that a nation cannot do without common thieves and homocidal ruffians. But an overwhelming case can be meade out for the statement that no nation can prosper or even continue to exist without heretics and advocates of shockingly immoral doctrines.

— George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950), Irish dramatist

Voting Rights Act Under Attack from the Right

Ballot blather: My fellow editors wonder sometimes how I can tolerate wingnut newsletters in my inbox. Sometimes I wonder myself. Here’s one I received yesterday that beggars understanding:

Offering foreign language ballots while at the same time emphasizing the importance of learning English sends mixed signals to those seeking to assimilate into American society.

ALERT: Our friends at Eagle Forum have notified us that this week, the House of Representatives will vote on H.R. 9, reauthorizing the Voting Rights Act (VRA). Within this legislation is a provision, originally added in 1975 (ten years after passage of the original VRA in 1965), which mandates the use of foreign language ballots in U.S. elections. Rep. Steve King (R-IA) has offered an amendment repealing this dangerous provision, but we have learned that House Republican leadership refuses to allow a vote on his amendment.

Foreign language ballots don’t make civic sense. You can’t vote unless you are a citizen (at least you’re not supposed to). To become a naturalized American citizen, our law requires that you demonstrate “an understanding of the English language, including an ability to read, write and speak… simple words and phrases… in ordinary usage in the English language.”

Foreign language ballots are costly to both taxpayers and local municipalities. The Government Accountability Office (GAO) reported that Los Angeles County taxpayers spent $1.1 million to provide ballots and election materials in five languages in 1996, escalating to $3.3 million in seven languages in March 2002. In several counties, the cost of foreign-language ballots is more than half the entire election expense!

In light of the Senate recently passing a bill granting AMNESTY to 12 million illegal aliens and importing up to 66 million NEW legal immigrants, America needs linguistic unity more than ever. Offering foreign language ballots while at the same time emphasizing the importance of learning English sends mixed signals to those seeking to assimilate into American society.

Now I won’t get into the lexigraphical meaning of all caps (SHOUTING!!!), but I will argue that translating ballot blather into Spanish and Creole is a good idea, at least in Miami. Here’s why:

The Town Charter currently provides that a general election shall be on the first Tuesday following the first Monday in October of each even-numbered year. It is proposed that the Town Charter be amended to provide that if a County general election is scheduled in the first two weeks of October in an even-numbered year, the Town election shall be held on that County election date.

Shall the above described amendment be adopted?

One might know enough English to fulfill workday duties, manage grocery transactions and generally get along in society, but still not be able to understand the gobbledegook that passes as ballot language. I hardly know what the heck I’m being asked to vote on in the above ballot initiative. Is this “ordinary usage in the English language?”

Like the gay-marriage Constitutional amendment proposal, the proposal to eliminate translation of ballots into languages other than English discriminatory and not in keeping with the spirit of the Constitution. Indeed, it would be the equivalent of reinstituting a poll tax — if you can’t read and fully understand ballotese, you can’t vote. Hmmm, my guess is that might disqualify a lot of the mouth-breathing knuckle-draggers who typically vote Republican ….

Docs Linking DHS to Hookers, Limos Missing

What letter? There’s a new twist in one of Editor Trish’s favorite investigations — the Rep. Randy “Duke” Cunningham hookers and limos story. Congress Daily reports that the House panel investigating whether Cunningham used limos paid for by the gubmint to ferry him and prostitutes (paid for by ??) to D.C. hotels has received an affadavit that connects Shirlington Limousine to the Department of Homeland Security via Cunningham.

Shirlington was awarded a $24 million contract by DHS to cart its staffers and executives around Washington. The affadavit, given by Shirlington President Christopher Baker, alleges that Cunningham wrote a letter to DHS extolling the virtues of Shirlington, which supposedly tipped the scales in the limo company’s favor.

Problem is, Baker is an ex-con with links to a defense contractor who is an unindicted co-conspirator in the Cunningham case who may have fraudulently qualified for the contract. See, the company was granted the DHS contract under a set-aside program, the Historically Underutilized Business Zone program, despite the fact that its offices are located in a luxury high-rise.

The other problem is, DHS can’t seem to find a copy of the letter in any of its files. Oh yeah, and Baker has now refused to hand over his copy of the phantom letter and other documents he promised the committee would clearly extablish links between Cunningham, DHS and Shirlington.

Stay tuned, Trish, for more shenanigans that involve more missing documents and false allegations and less sexy stuff like hookers and limos.

FEMA May Never Be Fully Staffed

Help wanted: Tropical Storm Alberto ushered in the 2006 hurricane season with a splash a couple of weeks ago, heralding the beginning of what will likely be an active period for tropical cyclones over the next five months. Alberto also marked the passing of an arbitrary deadline — when the Federal Emergency Management Agency was supposed to have a full complement of staff.

“We really have a case of ‘FEMA gone wild’ over there.”
—Rep. Bennie Thompson

According to GoveExec.com, the agency has responded to missing its third deadline by announcing that it would no longer set deadlines for full employment.

In a briefing Friday with reporters, FEMA Director R. David Paulison said the agency has hired about 85 percent of the workers it needs. This is the same percentage he offered when asked by a reporter May 23 about progress toward a goal of reaching 95 percent of capacity before June 1, when the hurricane season began.

Initially, the agency set a mid-May deadline for meeting that goal. Paulison pushed that date back to June 1, and the agency further delayed it to July, according to a FEMA fact sheet given to reporters last month.

Paulison took responsibility for the delays even though he’s been on the job less than a month. But his taking the blame while offering no solutions didn’t sit well with the House Homeland Security and Government Reform committees, which recently assumed oversight of FEMA because of its continued staff vacancies.

“One thing that the Department of Homeland Security has kept consistent is its inability to be straightforward,” said Rep. Bennie Thompson, D-Miss., the homeland security panel’s ranking member. “We really have a case of ‘FEMA gone wild’ over there, if leaders can’t even give us a straight answer on how many people are on staff and when we will have an effective fully staffed FEMA.”

Well, if the goal is “an effective fully staffed FEMA,” don’t hold your breath. Heck, those of us who live in Hurricane Alley would settle for just an “effective FEMA.”

Dr. Ho Rubs FDA Wrong Way

No mo’ Ho: The Food and Drug Administration has moved to seize two so-called medical devices from the market because the agency said the Dr. Ho’s Double Massage and Dr. Ho’s Muscle Massage don’t actually treat diabetic neuropathy, fibromyalgia, arthritis or migraine headaches, as advertised.

I found a funny review of Dr. Ho’s infomercial where he demonstrates his products primarily on scantily clad women:

“Not to be used by pregnant women, people with pacemakers, or epileptics” warns the gentle disclaimer that appears midway through the Dr. Ho Muscle Massager infomercial. After watching the device in action, viewers will suspect that for epileptics, Dr. Ho is not really dangerous — it’s merely redundant.

If you’re going to attach electrodes to body parts the person needs to expose that body part and hence not wear much — like a bathing suit

Of course, Dr. Ho has his defender, who took exception to the reviewer’s characterization of Dr. Ho as hokey:

So if you want a laugh ok, but at least stop telling people that it doesn’t work — it certainly does — also of course if you’re going to attach electrodes to body parts the person needs to expose that body part and hence not wear much — like a bathing suit — they choose to use the hip muscle because it’s a large muscle and you can see it react! You can’t tell what someone else feels — but you can SEE a reaction in a muscle and see that something is obviously going on! Do research and find out what you’re talking about before you spread claims!

But maybe the FDA has the goods on Dr. Ho after all:

Since these devices have not been approved by FDA, the safety parameters associated with their use and the efficacy of the devices for use to treat diseases have not been determined. These devices are misbranded because their labeling lacks adequate directions for intended use, they are not labeled prescription use only, and they are not being used by consumers by order of a licensed practitioner. They are further misbranded because they were manufactured at an unregistered facility.

So Cindy, me and the FDA urge you to Just Say No to Ho before it’s too late.

Is Tom DeLay a Texan or a Virginian?

State of mind: It matters to Democrat Nick Lampson, who wants to fill the congressional seat vacated when Tom “The Hammer” DeLay resigned this month. Problem is, the D-Guy won the Republican nomination in the March primary and so his name is still offically on the ballot — according to Texas Dems. Whoa, say Texas Repugs, that boy’s done gone and registered hisself to vote and went and voted in the primary by absentee ballot in Alexandria, Va., thereby making him a Virginian. According to Congressional Quarterly:

Imagine that — the words “DeLay” and “fraud” appearing together in the same sentence!

“We don’t think Mr. DeLay can be conclusively established by public records to be a resident of Virginia,” says Chad W. Dunn, the Texas Democrats’ general counsel and a lawyer with Riddle & Brazil in Houston.

The Democrats won a temporary restraining order earlier this month preventing Texas GOP Chairwoman Tina J. Benkiser from convening a meeting of 22nd District precinct chairmen, who in turn will pick four people to decide on DeLay’s ballot replacement. In court papers, the Democrats maintained that DeLay essentially perpetrated a fraud by campaigning for renomination — because, they allege, he’d already decided to resign the seat this spring — in an effort to leave it to party elders, not the voters, to pick the best possible candidate to face Lampson.

Imagine that — the words “DeLay” and “fraud” appearing together in the same sentence! Even as he was leaving Congress, the worm was manipulating the political process as a final gimme for the home team.

According to the ten-gallon Democrats, DeLay is still taking a homestead tax exemption on his house outside of Houston and is still on Texas voter rolls, both of which are kind of illegal, him being a Virginian and all. Topping that, though, is the fact that for two months after he allegedly obtained his Virginia driver’s license and voter registration, DeLay was still voting as a congressional representative of his district in Texas.

Man, that guy makes me glad I’m not a Texan or a Virginian. So it’s not such great shakes being a Floridian, but at least we don’t have Tom DeLay bringing a new, higher level of professional corruption into Sunshine State politics.

Berg: Revenge Breeds Revenge

Good question: Remember Nicholas Berg? He was the American contractor kidnapped and beheaded on camera, ostensibly by Abu Musab al-Zarqawi. CNN anchor Soledad O’Brien interviewed his father after Zarqawi was assassinated. It’s an interesting interview:

O’BRIEN: There’s a theory that as they try to form some kind of government, that it’s going to be brutal, it’s going to be bloody, there’s going to be loss, and that’s the history of many countries — and that’s just what a lot of people pay for what they believe will be better than what they had under Saddam Hussein.

BERG: Well, you know, I’m not saying Saddam Hussein was a good man, but he’s no worse than George Bush. Saddam Hussein didn’t pull the trigger, didn’t commit the rapes. Neither did George Bush. But both men are responsible for them under their reigns of terror.

I don’t buy that. Iraq did not have al Qaeda in it. Al Qaeda supposedly killed my son.

Under Saddam Hussein, no al Qaeda. Under George Bush, al Qaeda.

Under Saddam Hussein, relative stability. Under George Bush, instability.

Under Saddam Hussein, about 30,000 deaths a year. Under George Bush, about 60,000 deaths a year. I don’t get it. Why is it better to have George Bush the king of Iraq rather than Saddam Hussein?

Read the whole interview here.

Thanks to AK for the tip.