In response to the article I posted today describing a couple of innovative and important proposals for saving the institution of marriage — criminalizing adultery and de-licensing marriages that do not produce children — a Christian conservative wrote a rather lengthy response that caught my attention.
It would have been interesting to hear what a right-wing Christian thought about a tight clampdown on the rules related to marriage. Instead, as is typical of the Limbaugh-Hannity-O’Reilly-trained mind, this writer focused on the style of my article (my questionable wordsmithing), railed fantastical charges against “the Left” and offered wild suppositions about what I don’t know — but never got around to addressing the substance: locking up adulterers and annulling non-procreative marriages.
But this bit of Dittohead bombast made me chuckle:
The piece is also filled with fallacies, and I give the writer (and most activists) the benefit of the doubt in that they don’t read the Bible, and that they have been spoonfed the lies about what it contains and base it off of stereotypes instead of lying themselves. “In fact, there is nothing of any consequence about gay sex in either Testament.” Oh really? Ever read Leviticus? Probably not.
Leaving aside the fact that I am not an “activist” (and calling me one insults those who are), as it happens, I am extremely familiar with the contents of the Bible, especially Leviticus, and especially the part of Leviticus that says being gay is an abomination unto the Lord:
Leviticus 18:22: “You shall not lie with a male as with a woman; it is an abomination.”
Yup, and since “lying with” is Bible code for “having sex,” I’m in deep shit. But as bad as this is, a couple of lines down it gets worse — much worse:
Leviticus 20:13: “If a man lies with a male as with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination; they shall be put to death, their blood is upon them.”
What? No boiling in oil?
Yes, the biblical sentence for being gay is the death penalty. It is unambiguously clear. Gay people must be killed on sight, and their corpses are to be drenched in their own blood.
It says so in the Bible.
Which brings us to the tricky part. If you believe the Bible, and you believe that gay people are doomed to hell because of this edict in Leviticus, then you also have to believe gay people should be executed on the public square. If you don’t believe all those things, then why bother believing any of them?
The experience of human spirituality might well remain constant from millennium to millennium, but it is impossible to take seriously today judgments made by desert nomads 5,000 years ago about food storage, apparel, animal sacrifices, women’s rights and human sexuality. Our understanding of these things has changed radically — is still changing. What we know now renders the attitude of nomads in 3,000 BCE to be, well, inconsequential.
But Enough about Me
So let’s talk about you for a moment, dear reader. You may be thinking, “He’s just tap dancing around the issue to excuse his immoral lifestyle choice. I’m not gay so I’m going to be fine.”
Sorry. Even if you are as “completely heterosexual” as Rev. Ted Haggard, you are not off the hook, abominations-wise.
Sadly, dear reader, you have undoubtedly committed abomination-class sins in your life — maybe as recently as at lunchtime. Maybe even at this very moment. In fact, you could be committing an abomination-class sin as you are reading these words — without even knowing it.
Worse news: ignorance is no excuse. You have committed sins that are equally as bad, equivalently as offensive to the Lord, as anything any gay person has ever done. And you are going to hell in the very same handbasket.
So before you judge me and deny me the right to marry the man I love and have lived with for 28 years, let’s examine your sins more closely.
But first, let’s define our terms.
What Is an Abomination?
“Abomination” is a class of sins for which the ultimate punishment is being barred from heaven:
Revelation: 21:27: Anyone who practices abomination will not enter Heaven.
(By the way, this is one of only two mentions of abominations in the New Testament. The other is by the Big Guy himself. In Luke 16:15, Jesus defines the love of money as an abomination to God. Live it up now, Mr. Trump.)
While few abominations invoke the death penalty, gay-on-gay action is not the only one. Here’s my favorite:
Exodus 35:2: Six days shall work be done, but on the seventh day there shall be to you an holy day, a sabbath of rest to the LORD: whosoever doeth work therein shall be put to death.
Not much wiggle room on this one. If you have mowed the lawn, stopped by the office or baked a cake on Sunday, you are as big a sinner as the gayest person on the planet. Your earthly punishment is death and your cosmic penalty is eternal damnation.
So, hey — I’ll see you in hell.
Which of These Abominations Have You Committed?
There are close to 70 abominations listed in the Bible. Here are a few that you may have engaged in:
Abomination: Eating Ham
Deuteronomy 14:8: “The pig also because it is a splitter of the hoof but there is no cud. It is unclean for you. None of their flesh must you eat and carcass you must not touch.”
The Bible says that if you have eaten ham, you are just as bad a sinner, just as hellbound, as any homo.
Abomination: Eating Any Seafood Other Than Fish — and Birds You Probably Wouldn’t Eat Anyway
Leviticus 11:10-19: “But anything in the seas or the rivers that has not fins and scales, of the swarming creatures in the waters and of the living creatures that are in the waters, is an abomination to you. They shall remain an abomination to you; of their flesh you shall not eat, and their carcasses you shall have in abomination. Everything in the waters that has not fins and scales is an abomination to you.”
The Bible says that eating lobster, shrimp, clams, eel, squid or octopus is equally as heinous as being gay. If you have eaten any of these things, you are going to hell alongside us homos.
“And these you shall have in abomination among the birds, they shall not be eaten, they are an abomination: the eagle, the vulture, the osprey, the kite, the falcon according to its kind, every raven according to its kind, the ostrich, the nighthawk, the sea gull, the hawk according to its kind, the owl, the cormorant, the ibis, the water hen, the pelican, the carrion vulture, the stork, the heron according to its kind, the hoopoe, and the bat.”
Good news: Parrots are okay to eat and, if you enjoy bat meat, there appears to be a loophole. Bats are mammals not birds.
Abomination: Eating Leftovers
Leviticus 19:7: “If it is eaten at all on the third day, it is an abomination.”
The Bible says that eating three-day-old leftovers and being gay are equivalent sins.
Abomination: Eating Snakes and Crawly Critters
Leviticus 11:42: “Whatever goes on its belly, and whatever goes on all fours, or whatever has many feet, all the swarming things that swarm upon the earth, you shall not eat; for they are an abomination.”
Abomination: Eating Sacrificed Animals
Leviticus 7:18: If any of the flesh of the sacrifice of his peace offering is eaten on the third day, he who offers it shall not be accepted, neither shall it be credited to him; it shall be an abomination, and he who eats of it shall bear his iniquity.
No worries for you here, I hope.
Abomination: Having a Psychic Reading or Checking Your Horoscope
Deuteronomy 18:10-12 “When you come into the land which the LORD your God gives you, you shall not learn to follow the abominable practices of those nations. There shall not be found among you any one who burns his son or his daughter as an offering, any one who practices divination, a soothsayer, or an augur, or a sorcerer, or a charmer, or a medium, or a wizard, or a necromancer. For whoever does these things is an abomination to the LORD; and because of these abominable practices the LORD your God is driving them out before you.”
Abomination: Burning Incense
Isaiah 1:13: Bring no more vain offerings; incense is an abomination to me. New moon and sabbath and the calling of assemblies — I cannot endure iniquity and solemn assembly.
Sorry, Catholics.
Abomination: Cheating at Business
Deuteronomy 25:13-16: “You shall not have in your bag two kinds of weights, a large and a small. You shall not have in your house two kinds of measures, a large and a small. A full and just weight you shall have, a full and just measure you shall have; that your days may be prolonged in the land which the LORD your God gives you. For all who do such things, all who act dishonestly, are an abomination to the LORD your God.”
Proverbs 11:1 A false balance [scale] is an abomination to the LORD, but a just weight is his delight.
Abomination: Women Wearing Pants, Men Dressing in Drag
Deuteronomy 22:5: “A woman shall not wear anything that pertains to a man, nor shall a man put on a woman’s garment; for whoever does these things is an abomination to the LORD your God.”
Yes, ladies, if you wear jeans, it is an abomination equal to the sin of being a drag queen.
Abominations: Haughtiness, Lying, Killing the Innocent, Wicked Scheming, Seeking out Evil and Troublemaking
Proverbs 6:16-19: There are six things which the LORD hates, seven which are an abomination to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that make haste to run to evil, a false witness who breathes out lies, and a man who sows discord among brothers.
Can’t help but think that George W. Bush is in a heap of trouble on this one.
Abomination: Arrogance
Proverbs 16:5: Every one who is arrogant is an abomination to the LORD; be assured, he will not go unpunished.
Summary
We’re all going to hell.
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I chuckled at the suggestion that I didn’t know Leviticus because only someone who truly does not know what Leviticus says in full would have made the suggestion.The issue of abominations is a booby trap for Bible believers.
If you believe being gay is such a horrible sin that it disqualifies gay people from having equal civil rights, then you cannot say you don’t equally believe that homos should be rounded up and gassed.
You must also accept the fact that people who eat shellfish, women who wear pants, kids who eat leftovers, businesspeople who cheat, frequenters of psychics, liars, stuck-up people, schemers, troublemakers, the wealthy and others who wallow in abominable sin should all have their civil rights curtailed too.
It defies logic — not to mention civility — to single out the proscription on homosexuality in Leviticus for special treatment. It should be treated like the other abominations: inconsequentially.
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NOTE: I found this source to be handy in assembling the information in this article.
“Good news if you enjoy bat meat. There appears to be a loophole. Bats are mammals not birds.”
Uh, I think you have it wrong (as does every biologist.) The bible says birds, so bats are birds! :)
Hail Eris! Praise ‘BoB’! Cthulhu fhtagn!
Nice jeremiad, J.
If given the choice between a so-called “heaven” populated by the likes of Jerry Fatwell and Pat Robberson and going to a hell that has Mick Jagger and Paris Hilton, i’ll take hell any day of the week…including Sunday’s
greg bacon
ava, MO
Excellent repost. Some of your best writing and clearest thinking. Never mind the sincerety and passion. I am proud of you. Love Mom
Although you are from North Carolina, I believe Molly Ivins can rest easy (wherever she landed).
She has a successor in style, spirit, doing one’s homework before running at the mouth…all her best qualities are exemplified in this piece.
Go get syndicated!
Let’s not forget divorce and the marriage of divorced couples…both are abominations. Deuteronomy 24: 1-4.
Great article!!
Don’t forget all of those people judging others!!
excellent!
some interesting stuff in there which i didnt know before.
thanks.
This article is great. I read through the bible a while ago myself, and I found it very interesting. Although I’m not sure if it is an abomination, my favorite… (rule maybe)… is that a menstruating woman is “unclean” and has to be separated during that week. It also says that if anyone were to sit where she sat, or lay in a bed that she laid in, they too would be “unclean”. Ridiculous.
Your article amused the hell out of me. I am by no means a religious person, however I sometimes wonder that “if” the bible would HAPPEN to be true, (And i’ve never read it in its entirety) just how bad shape would I be in… Well it’s comforting to know that no matter what we do, if we live relatively normal lives according to the standards of western civilization we’re pretty much all good and fucked. So I guess i’ll see you in hell. Maybe we can have a martini with the anti-“Big Guy”…
Amen! The bible can not be used to justify a hatred or discrimination against gays unless one also hates and discriminates against eaters of shellfish, etc.
Another bogus argument that I hear all the time is that, if given equal rights, gay people would push their lifestyle on the rest of us. This is a ludicrous statement. I am quite convinced that nobody can turn me or my family gay. And I don’t really think the people making this argument even believe it. But, it sounds better than the truth.
How refreshing would it be if these anti gay critics would drop all of their irrational arguments and admit, “I just don’t like gay people.”
Then we’d finally see the ugly truth here, and it would become painfully obvious that such biases are not appropriate foundations on which to build our public policy.
Well now, I am happy to hear I will find myself in such pleasant, interesting company if indeed I do spend my after-life in eternal damnation for my sinful sexual orientation/activities/shell-fish consumption, ego and all my other many faults.
Of course, as I firm believer in God, I can promise you, my gal/guy, he/she doesn’t play by the rules these folks have laid out for us all. As they say, interpretation is half the game in communication. Personally, I think the scribe who was taking notes for the book outline -Bible played a seriously mean joke on some cross-dressing shell-fish eaters, or maybe..he just couldn’t spell correctly. We will likely never really know, but thats my guess.
At any rate, back to the point of gay vs. not gay, the God in my minds eye. He/She probably laughs a bit as he watched us continually face all this nonsense and conflict. This man-made adversity and challenge, conflicts we humans seem to conjure up amongst ourselves for benefit of none.
Unfortunately, there will always be some in a group who refuse to accept the innate truth that we are all fundamentally human. Therefore all of us are born equally deserving some basic human freedoms. Those enjoyed by the many..should not be hidden or kept from the few.
We all deserve equality and conversely all carry the burden of responsibility for our actions, reaction dealing with eachother.
These few zealots willing to continue to fight to make create a wall of bigotry, they actually take battle against “love” between two human beings. Wishing to deny them the opportunity to celebrate publicly, legally their union. But those unfounded, fear-based biases will not withstand the power of love. There exist too much power in the will of person (or people) and willingness to fight to share this experience; the single most sacred of any human ability.
Indeed, it is these folks we should pity most in their sad jealousy and fear. I’ll bet the hell they live in created by that kind of short-minded, turn a blind-eye to fairness and lack the capacity to extend a hand of compassion, respect or dignity to fellow mankind.
…Theirs is an internal hell that I would rather not ever have to imagine being prisoner to. In short, I would not go back and change my orientation – I cannot – it is WHO I AM, but sadly, I bet those folks one day will regret their blindness and intolerance.
Even if they do not and instead remain ignorant to this as an injustice against their fellows – the real-World (our collective conciousness) this World, it does not.
Mathew 15:10,11 Not that which goeth into the mouth defileth a man; but that which cometh out of the mouth, this defileth a man.
Mathew 15:9 And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.
Mathew 15:24 And again I say unto you, It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God.
25
When his disciples heard it, they were exceedingly amazed, saying, Who then can be saved?
26 But Jesus beheld them, and said unto them, With men this is impossible; but with God all things are possible.
Mathew 7:1 Judge not, that ye be not judged.
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As far as same sex marriage goes, I personnally feel that civil marriages with all the Rights and Responsibilities ought to be legal, as long as any church is not REQUIRED to recognize them and are allowed to call down the Wrath of God on such if it wants.
Churches aren’t REQUIRED to recognize anyone’s marriage today, and won’t be when gay marriage is legalized.
Religious people seem to think they own the word “marriage.” Maybe it’s confusing because weddings often happen in churches, but the religous and legal aspects of marriage are totally separate. Marriage is a civil agreement, like a contract. The religious ceremony is a blessing that has no legal ramifications. Proof of this: when couples get divorced, they don’t go to church to do the paperwork, they go to court.
What gay people want is the legal right to marry. Some gay people will get married in churches, others in country clubs or wedding chapels, justice of the peace offices, courthouses or drive-thru windows in Vegas — just like dual-gender couples do.
“Separate but equal” is not necessary and probably wouldn’t be constitutional.
You failed to mention:
coming into contact with a woman on her period for she is unclean, and don’t even think of sex with a woman who is having her period.
wearing mixed fiber clothing
cutting of ones beard
eating meat with dairy products is forbidden
My take on being told I’m an abomination, is to simply reply that if one law is valid and can be used as a weapon against homosexuals – THEN ALL THE LAWS MUST APPLY. You don’t get to pick and choose and you don’t get to use Jesus as an excuse, either he fulfilled ALL the laws or none.
So, if you follow the law, then as the author noted, we’re all not getting into heaven.
Eric
Absolutly briliant article!
this website is an abomination.
i sincerely hope i go to hell.
i want to put as much distance as possible between me and some of you folks here!
Luckily Jesus forgives us of our transgression’s when we seek it with an honest heart. He died so that we may all be forgiven. His perfect sacrifice made it so that we could enter into Heaven. “All men have sinned and come short of the glory of God.” So then who is without sin? I sincerely hope that heaven and hell are a reality for you, friend. I do believe there is a place we go when we die and I want to go to Heaven. Jesus loves everyone, even the most sinfull person. And he forgives those who repent. He forgave me.
I was really sad when I read your article. Just like many on the right, and on the left — you pick and choose and take things out of context. John 3:16 says that God loves us; and whoever believes in Him has everlasting life. Read the book of Romans — It’s all about our humanness. As believers we grow out of sin – and into what he wants us to be; and the world knows us by our love. Real Christians are not haughty – we are forgiven and strenghthened to obey God — as written in the New Testament.
Thanks, Leanette. I appreciate the sentiment, but would point out that you also picked and chose some of the more benign passages from the New Testament to include here. To say that “love everybody” sums up the message of the Bible is to leave out a lot of context.
The Bible is a Rorsach Test. What people see in it reflects who they are, which speaks well of you, btw. When homophobes use the Bible to attack gay people, they pick and choose the bits that bolster their personal prejudices.
I see the Bible as an ancient collection of stories filled with magical acts and universal truisms. It has no relevance beyond that to me or, in my opinion, modern life.
I see you are stuck in the Old Testament. Sham on you. When Christ came, he did away with the old and write a new testament. The Old is used as a guidline, we are to follow the new testament. Where have you been? How blind are you? do not preach your false words. The new testament clearly states, that although homos are still an abomination, eating shellfish is not! Read Corinthians. Then shut up, because your point is as empty as a vast void.
There’s nothing about shellfish in Corinthians or, in fact, anywhere in the New Testament, Michael. Maybe you’re thinking about this bit of self-serving fantasy from Acts 10:9-16:
No mention of shellfish here. Only land and air creatures have been cleansed by the blood of Jesus. So Christians should take note: If you eat shrimp, crawfish or lobsters, you are going to burn in a pool of fire forever.
Corinthians does have this word of warning for women, however:
Therefore women who speak in church are going into the eternal fondue pot, right along with the rest of us. (Look, there’s Joyce Meyer!)
Misogyny and homophobia were acceptable when these letters were supposedly written 1,900 years ago, as was slavery. (Ephesians 6:5-9: “Servants, be obedient to them that are your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembling, in singleness of your heart, as unto Christ.”)
Despite its biblical seal of approval, slavery is no longer acceptable. Increasingly so, neither are misogyny and homophobia.
Besides which, Paul, the purported author of the letters to the Christians in Corinth, was even more damning of extramarital sex than he was about homosexuality — which means that all you adulterers and sexually active unmarried couples are going into the broiler with the rest of us. Forever.
Look, using the biblical proscription against gay sex as an excuse to restrict the rights of gay people is a bunch of hooey. Christians of a certain ilk reflexively exaggerate the importance of these Biblical injunctions, making it seem like anti-gay edicts are a central theme of the Bible. They are not. There are dozens, if not hundreds, of other sins that are as grievous or worse.
When the day comes that these Christians start advocating restricting the civil rights of these other sinners — adulterers, fornicators, liars, people who eat shrimp and who work on Sundays — then I’ll believe their use of Scripture to justify restricting my rights is sincere. It will still be wrong and irrelevant since we live under a civil government, not a theocracy — but at least it will be sincere.
Otherwise, I believe people who use Bible verses to excuse their obsessive hatred toward gay people are lying to themselves. They need to look in their own hearts and ask themselves what they are truly afraid of.
Ha ha ha ha! This is what the wpr;d has come to, people actually supporting gays! If im not mistaken during the Spanish Inquisition thousands of faggots were slaughtered in the name of the lord, but i guess you must be right because people over time are always smarter… Maybe you also support rapist raping little children, because i sure as hell don’t. You would probalby think that God loves everyone and that were only human right? Ha, God put us on Earth to see whom would fit into his kingdom right and the people who dont follow his laws wil not. I do agree that things such as eating shellfish is not really against God’s will, but thins chanhe over time. Yes you may say that homosexuality should be allowed, well then why can’t i go out and kill someone? Because that would be a sin and so would be sleeping with a person of the same sex.
The people back then also had a differnet culture then we do know today. They may not have eaten raw fish like we do, but they hit thier children when they did bad. I dont know anywhere in the bible thier are children’s rights like this, so why is it outlawed today? No one gets hurt because of it, unless they come from a curropt family. I also think that because people don’t hit thier children and so, our children are so messed up today, tell me if im wrong.
I love how you progressives say you are supporting human rights, but really when you see a completely left government, such as the USSR do you see the russians having any rights? I don’t, because they dont!
@BEN,
First off, how old are you? Second, what is your educational background? Why do I ask these things of you?
First, your usage of the term ‘faggots’, and your failure to grasp simple grammar indicate the lack of a proper education, by either choice or educational grade level.
Secondly, the USSR does not exist today. It existed between 1922 and 1991. Russians do have rights, but are of mixed acceptance, depending on the rights involved: civil liberties, economic rights, and rights of the person. While they may share different views on these right than do other nations, they do have rights.
With so many educational weaknesses, how is anyone to take you seriously?
When you enter high school or maybe even college, come back an try again. Until then, share your opinions on the playground during recess with those of equal intellectual immaturity.
In the new testament Paul allow christians to eat what is forbidden to the jews. However he did still consider same-sex eroticism an abomination.
Let us not forget that in those days the culture was different. The only heterosexuals in antiquity was the jews (and ultimately the christians) Every other nation in those days accepted same sex relation. In the helenic society bi-sexuality was the norm. Great men like Alexander the Great and Julius Cesar had sex with both men and women.
Religious cults of goddesses like Cybele, Afrodite, Istar and Innana had a presthood of what we today would call transsexuals.
Judaism and christianity do not represent a heigher religion! They represent a psychopathic rejection of the natural world!
Heaven with fundamentalist Christians or hell with awesome people like Andrea James, Kate Bornstein and George Carlin. There couldn’t be an easier decision!
Plus, isn’t heaven supposed to be alcohol free? How can there be a hell worse than a place with no kaluha or Bailey’s Irish Creme?
I firmly believe that everyone, gay or straight, should have the right to be MISERABLE. That’s why I support same-sex marriage. The first (and perhaps most important) tenet of the Bible is “Judge not, that ye be not judged.” The second? “Love thy neighbor as thyself.” We are all neighbors.
I am a fundamentalist Christian and would like to respond.
First, I can totally understand the anger and frustration that many people feel towards Christians. We, Christians, are as imperfect as anybody. Your article points out how many of us miss the mark of perfection. The point of the Law was to prove to man that he could not ever meet God’s standard of perfection on his own. Jesus, God’s Son, came to Earth and did all the work for us with the Law and then paid our penalty for us by dying on the cross and taking our punishment of hell. IF you have put your faith in man, instead of Christ, then you have plenty to be angry about. Man made religion, like man made government, is corrupt and judgemental. Being in Church makes you a Christian like being in a garage makes you a car. Live by Christ’s standards and principles not a religion’s or another person’s. Jesus gave us few rules, in fact, two — Love God and Love your neighbor (the two principles contained in the Ten Commandments). We are no longer bound by the Law if we accept the fact that Jesus is who the Bible says He is and if we accept His offer of Grace for our sins.
Okay, so let’s talk about the homosexuality part. Growing up in the eighties, I was very prejudice against gay people. I said awful things about them up through my twenties and early thirty’s. I do feel awful for that. I was raised in a very strict religion and quite frankly, I was taught to hate homosexual people. But, something happened when I was thirty one. I met my Christian wife and we began an exploration of scripture and prayer together. I have found through prayer and a close relationship with Christ that my sin of hating homosexuals was even more against God’s heart than any act of sex or sin. I knew there was a homosexual man where I worked and I decided to try and be friendly towards him. What I found out was shocking. He accepted my offer and really invited me into a friendship with him. He never crossed any lines with me when it came to my sexuality (this was my initial fear), but rather shared many personal thoughts with me. I was able to share Christ with him and hopefully help him to build a relationship with God. He is still a great friend of mine. Fast forward the clock a decade and I have a very dear friend at work who is gay and HIV positive. He is also a Christian who loves Jesus with all his heart. He is as saved as I am or any other Christian. My realization now is that Hell was not made for sinners. You can’t get into hell by sinning (any sexual act outside of marriage, stealing, lying, cheating, the list goes on forever!). You get to Hell by rejecting the free offer of Grace which Christ extends to ALL of us. Please release your fear, mistrust, and hurt. Seek Christ in prayer and through the Scriptures. Don’t put your faith in man or religion but rather in Christ. It does not matter what I think sin is or is not, what matters is that when we accept Christ as our saviour, all sin is forgiven no matter how large or how small. He loves us all. It is not about defining sin, it is about admitting we all commit it and accept the offer of free grace through faith in Christ Jesus.